To abandon the self…. Abandonment series is coming Jan 2014





The struggle of what comes to us when we are thinking we are not worthy, we are not enough, we are not being heard comes from a place inside that isn’t about the other person, events or what is actually our view point at the time but rather what we are not listening to inside of ourselves, We’d rather make this about the ignoring of what we are doing to what is inside that is being said that we become almost irritated, irate or feel betrayal of abandonment by the events, people or the silence we aren’t listening to as a  form of communication with this information lodged within!  We elect this as a way of thinking not truly even seeing we are emitting the energy of bringing more of what is going on outside of us rather that was is going inside of us.  The more the vibration of what we find irritates us inside resonates from what we are doing inside of us.


Here it is…  Let me give a scenario in which this becomes the truth and you make everything else a lie.   Gosh I need a break, I need to meditate more, I wish I could do this for myself.  As this energy is placed on a back burner, we don’t see the energy of making ourselves secondary and then when we don’t get it from ourselves we end up blowing up at those that do the same, not because we see us doing it to ourselves but because we don’t see the energy we created for those close to us to do the same that we already do to ourselves.  This false sense of being is the lie, the truth is we again found a way to make what we give ourselves secondary to ourselves and then become enraged, sad, alone, because we don’t do so for ourselves thus the energy polarity will never be as strong as to what we say we give to everyone else in priority. (This gives new meaning to how deep you can give to another does it not?)


We are the root of the energy that surrounds us, to change this you have to dive into your own energy and give yourself this first.  This is what is meant by you can’t give someone what you don’t give yourself.  Do you see the dysfunction in what you seek outside you, is never going to be the energy that will elude you, not because you see this as it is happening as a cycle, but because you created the energy to give abandonment energy to yourself making others see this same energy without their knowing to give you more of the same of what you do to yourself.


Your true joy in radiant being is found in what you give to yourself and what you can share after doing so with another.  This energy is fully present in all things it’s not seen as this way of translating but can you imagine if it was?


Love this about you, as this is where the food for the ego becomes dangerous. It has this about what you are doing to yourself, and now will give you permission to have self pity, where self pity is the over lying blanket to the truth of what this really is.  Love is what you are in this moment and love in this moment is what can embrace you through this to give you this truth of love you are inside of any and all streams of energy you create without knowing!   In knowing you are more beyond this, it is the energy itself that has no sense of self your knowing is that self!


Here is one more example,  when asked when was the last time you placed your hand over your heart to sync with yourself and give yourself the attention in love you can give yourself, and you say I keep meaning to, isn’t this the same thing you are complaining about that others won’t give you?  Do you see the writing on the wall as it pertains to energy?  You give the silent permission to make yourself secondary not seeing that the energy is silent and still will be something others will hear and do to you as you do to yourself, even if you don’t think they can!


Do you feel what is left here in what has been shared?  Do you see how this when truly felt in what it is can give a love greater in knowing then thinking.  Just be my friend!


Love Deeply not just to those who surround you but to yourself which will be a much greater love that they will experience from you!

With Love,

Lois and Clark




Make 2014 Your year for Healing!!!

Healing series!

Know thy self….

ice-loves-cocoThe true answer to a question…?

The truth answers all questions and doesn’t require thinking to stand in it! It’s when it becomes a lie that thinking stands directly in it and causes a false way into being.

What do you think happens when this life is over?

As we are shown a line we see it can be infinite… Just because it is not being drawn do we say that it ends… Your life is sustaining the line that you can’t see the end. This is the first truth you accept as that your life is continuous this existence is not. When has energy ever stopped being energized? Ask yourself for this truth and the truth shall be pointed to you. What is aliveness to you is going to point you to a stream whether it be water or life.. Water is the human vessel that you have and no matter where you are in this existence you know water is always there. This is a truth and you can embrace it as such as a life stream that will evolve yet never truly die. Only the form will change not the existence of life itself.

I just met my new or possibly old spiritual guide this morning during my meditation… It appeared as a white orb… it is going to guide me threw the next stage of my enlightenment… wondering if anyone else would like to share a similar experience.

The path one can take when awakening can be by the pull of something that is always making its way to you. When I took my existence I felt something was taken from me, as far as what I can tell I totally lost my mind (EGO), i experience clearly the orbs mentioned along with the entering and exiting of energy that comes to either speak to what I have no way other than to share it in truth. This can be an energy that was here before or an energy that still creates the here we exist within. It is quite a feat as I speak Lois often says they didn’t understand what you said cause you speak alien… I am ofter reminded that not many speak from what I can from what I am within now. I know we speak human but we miss the depth that it can speak from. I find it not so much possible to determine which is the truth anymore my travels in my body or the travels out of my body. I spend this moment just inside using this body to get from here to there.. But the soul that derives from orb energy is derived from the source. This path can be a path that points you to it!

For those of you who have been in long term partnerships: If you and your significant other were introduced to each other for the first time today, spent a little time getting acquainted, would you still end up in a relationship together?

No… we would go through the annihilation process again.. for without this the removal of roles that we both played in relationships before our meeting would need the awakening to transpire as a point of impact of the truth. The pain would be something we would endure again. For without this the uncovering of the birth of the true self would not emerge and the connection that didn’t need our egos would be brought back to the front of the mental capacity of what we deemed was a relationship would be back in place. How do you hide from destiny is uncovered through the enduring pains you experience in this existence. It will take these away from you when you experience it as it is! Through pain that the truth will set you free of!

Who you are beyond what you think you are…

How does this manifest itself when you are constantly thinking, you are thinking as a matter of consequence.  As you go inside yourself there is something happening inside you that is love.. There is nothing about this love that is seeking answers it is only generating the energy you are in all moments as the answer to any question.

As you possess the knowing inside you, this is how you can find the energy that mirrors your own.  Not because something outside you told you this was possible but because inside you as a stream of energy it has it’s origin.

As I found myself it wasn’t because I was in search inside, I was constantly seeking outside myself as we are all taught to do.  There could never be any truth to this search and it did what it was supposed to do.  It would give me content to grasp something that will forever elude me and never give me any of my own truth.  Just more energy of what I was not as a way of being.  Do you seek knowing thy self?

Ice-T-and-Coco-Discuss-Their-Wedding-DayDo you seek knowing who is your mirror of yourself without the mind then you can have come to the right place.  Here in these writings is my own fortress of solitude that pointed me inside myself.  You will find something that resonates inside yourself.  Not because it was left her for you to find a new belief but because inside each of us there is no path of questions that point you to your own truth.  Well that truth is the root of who you are without anyone telling you.  I hope this finds you loving deeply,

Sometimes the patience comes to from knowing..


Be Vulnerable?

man20and20bear1Vulnerability and you…..


Had an amazing meeting last night where it seemed that vulnerability was the topic of discussion this ranged from rejection to fear of rejection to the inevitable why someone makes the choices they make whether it is showing a side of themselves that has the ability to make them look weak.


Being true to yourself and others is a great ability that we result in making a very scary place to stand within.  This could be how we approach others, how we become confrontational when confrontation is far from what we are trying to express.  This leads to thinking that we are less than somehow.  The issue results in us being very avoidable, very discreet and in some cases just plain disconnected from others to cause our energy to seem unapproachable.


When we express our vulnerable side we have a choice.  We can walk up to those that are hurting or hiding and offer our hand out to help them through this.  We can do this in a multitude of ways.  Offering something in kindness, asking them if they are ok and state that if they need someone to compassionately listen then it becomes the safe jacket we all need.  If you stand in your truth of why you are feeling their energy you can state it in such a way to offer someone a ear to listen to what is going on in ones thoughts.


It is true we are all walking elements of love.  If you lose site of this because you are identified with your ego, you will indeed keep feeding this ego thoughts to keep you isolated from letting go the of this way of thinking.



With that we are posting this poll and asking this as a direct question?


What is healthy to do when feeling vulnerable?



Vulnerability is a weakness that hides the truth?



Love Deeply,

Lois and Clark

Lois and Clark Spiritual Beings in a Human World!

We are often asked how do you incorporate your human lives with your spiritual lives, for example a woman recently asked me how do you live your daily life in spirituality when the bills need paid the dishes need done the kids need fed ect.  My answer to her question is We are not Humans in a Spiritual world, we are Spiritual beings in a human world, we personally don’t allow the human world to dictate us spiritually, now that being said do we fail sometimes? yes we do, we both sometimes realize our mind noise is dictating our actions and we need to snap out of it.

Clark and I have a family, we do have “Human” activities we have to do, The housework, the bills ect we dont float around on a perfect little cloud spreading fairy dust on our home and everything magically gets done lol. I guess the difference she was referring to was how we do those tasks spiritually, well we do them together. There is no one sided relationship that will ever work, Togetherness is what we longed for and baby its what we got!  There is not much we dont do together, we eat together, we sleep together,we work together we share the same phone, the same e mail, we really dont do much separate from one another… Do we disagree some,,, yes we do, however its not nearly what you would “think” Clark and I do not have “fights” we have disagreements we get through them quickly.

In the past 2 years we have both been led to leave the “human” work force and begin our Journey doing what we are supposed to be doing, Which is helping others along in their Journey, Bringing more Peace into Relationships and Families. Teaching the Love of Self, Teaching others the Power of the Now, Guiding those who feel they have a mountain in front of them, and those who have fallen and feel there is nothing more. Its never draining, Its never Boring, Its always rewarding.

Remaining in a Spiritual state of being, Its just keeping peace inside of yourself, Its simple,when we are doing the housework in peace with no mind noise of what is coming, what we need to do next, what bill is due, what family drama is coming about, when we just do it, in the moment, in peace that to us is remaining spiritual in a human world. When the human things come about and we take just 5 mins alone and just shut the mind down leave the room to go meditate, That is staying spiritual in a human world. When we let the family drama handle itself and we dont add any fuel to it, when we inject peace and unconditional love instead, That is staying spiritual in a human world. When we stop and just dance in the middle of the room no mater who is there, That is staying spiritual in a human world.

Just remaining in the moment,loving one another unconditionally, not sweating the small stuff, and remaining together and on the same page in every situation, that is how we stay in our spirituality, We lay our heads down at night together in peace and just like the Lotus, the next day is brand new and we open up to a whole new world! Spiritual Beings in a Human world!


Are you Single and Looking for “The One”?

Are you Ready to Give up your search? Tired of finding many fish that need thrown back? Tired of waiting for the call the next day after a date that never comes? Are you wondering what is wrong with you? Do you feel your “LOVE” ship has already sailed? Its getting cold, are you wishing you could have someone to snuggle with? Do you have someone who won’t commit? What the heck is going on??? Lets Fix This!!!

Does this sound like you??

We have an upcoming Webinar Sunday Evening(Nov 17th) we only have 24 openings left!  You will need Audio and Video capability,,,,, The Webinar for 1 hr is only $50.00    e mail us or message us for details! first-date



My dream last night was simple, I went on a journey inside of my hands, I was able to feel what my hands felt, it was a journey Ill not forget. I woke up and Clark got up and I called him back over just so I could  touch him, wrapped my arms around him and let my hands feel his skin. The texture of his skin is so soft and warm. I then had a few moments to myself and went off into a quick meditation when I came out I looked at my hands.

My hands held my parents hands as a child, they held my ears when i heard the arguing and the hitting, they covered my eyes, they wrote my name for the first time and they haven’t stopped lol.  My hands held my children , changed their diapers,soothed their fevered foreheads, my hands cook dinner for my family, set the table for family dinners, they have tucked many gifts from the tooth fairy under pillows, they have wrapped many presents, they have zipped backpacks, they have hit in protection. They have raised to cover for protection, They fold in prayer, they open in meditation,they have pet precious family pets, they have painted walls, cleaned carpets, washed dishes, they have planted flowers, they have planted vegetables and fruit, they have held the cold hands of loved ones who have passed, The have written letters form my heart onto paper.

My hands hold Clarks, they go through his hair, touch his skin. They are scarred, they are sometimes tired, however they still have so much to do, they have grandchildren to hold, they have flowers to hold, they have words to type, just as they have typed these, They have medicine to give, They are medicine, They are healers, They are lovers, They are friends….Take a look at your hands, appreciate them for what they have done for you, use them wisely in everything they WILL do for you.

What have you have already touched in your life? What will you touch now?



angry-coupleIn Every relationship in our lives, friendships, family, romantic and professional can potentially be destroyed by conflict. The solution is not to ignore the conflict or keep moving around hoping to find the perfect person or perfect people. We need to deal with the problems we currently face, otherwise they will just reappear elsewhere. The only thing we have the power to change in any relationship is ourselves and our own attitude. We can’t expect to change other people, but we can learn to deal with relationships in a way that promotes peace and diffuses conflict. Learning to Resolve conflicts in a relationship is one of the most important life skills we can develop and it is something we need to value.

I believe, it is important to see the problem from the other person’s perspective. This does not mean we have to agree with their viewpoint; it means we try to see the issue from a different perspective. This can at least help us to understand where they are coming from, and why they have their particular mindset. If we can do this we may wish to moderate our stance because we understand why they are acting in a certain way. If we only look at things from our perspective, conflict will certainly arise. A major cause of conflict in relationships is when we expect people to behave in a certain way. The problem with expecting certain behavior is that we get upset when they fail to live up to our expectations. Even those close to us are not our responsibility; we need to be tolerant of their mistakes and limitations. We have to respect their decisions on how to live their life. This detachment is not indifference; we can retain concern , but there comes a point where we need to give people the freedom to make their own choices, even if we don’t agree with them.

Unfortunately, if we respond to situations by getting angry we will make the situation even worse. Anger holds a feeling of aggression and condemnation which people struggle to deal with it. It also calls out and it encourages people to respond in a similar way. If we feel angry, the best solution is to avoid talking , arguing at that particular time. We should calm our anger before confronting other people. Any conflict will only be heightened by anger. Similarly, if people approach us with anger, we have to learn to respond differently ,silence is better than getting mad at someone.

Most of the time we get what we aspire for. If we really value peace in our relationships with others, then we will make it happen. If we make proving the other person wrong or proving ourselves right the priority, then there will be a constant feeling of superiority and inferiority which breeds conflict. If we keep reminding ourselves of the desirability of peace we won’t allow ourselves to become argumentative and miserable.

One of the secrets to maintaining good relationships is generating a feeling of oneness. This means we will feel happy at the success of others; we will sympathize when they experience difficulties; we will strive to avoid hurting their feelings. In oneness there is no superiority and inferiority. Without oneness, we are prone to feelings of pride, jealousy and insecurity. If you feel a really genuine sense of oneness with other people, how can you want to hurt them? Certainly this is the case is romantic relationships, the very last thing we should want to do is hurt the one we are in love with, I know it hurts me to the core when I say anything hurtful to Lee. It should also ring very true in family relationships, every family has conflict, most every time its caused by egos colliding, I have found that ridding myself of my ego has been most helpful, this has removed any and all conflict within myself for anyone I am associated with. I allowed my mind to tell me that without my ego I would be just an insecure human being.

When we are full of insecurities our relationships become more difficult. The problem is that if we are insecure about ourselves we can become judgemental about other people; to make ourselves feel better we will start criticizing others. We may not be conscious of this, but it does happen.(This is why i choose to not let my mind control me) When we are at peace with ourselves, good peaceful relationships come natural. When we have inner peace , we don’t rely on other people to give us security and praise. When we are at peace with ourselves, we tend to have a sympathetic and positive view of the world. Often we want to blame bad relationships on other people; but, actually the only thing we can really do is to work on ourselves. If we develop inner peace  our relationships will definitely improve.

When tense situations arise, talking can be the most effective way of moving past the problem. Some things are best left unsaid; it does no one any good to bring up old conflicts unless absolutely necessary, what has already happened cannot be changed. When talking we should try to talk about positive issues; look for things which we agree on and can work together on.

Don’t get upset about little things. In the great cosmic game, most of the minor personality conflicts are relatively insignificant. If we get mad when someone doesn’t do the washing up, how are we going to react when they do something really bad? If you find yourself getting worked up by a series of small things, take a step back and try to evaluate their relative importance. For each minor failing try to think of a really good quality of that person. If you are sincere you will feel that this good quality is far more important than the minor indiscretion, This is something I have had to step back myself and put into action.

No conflict is difficult. If we are willing to change our attitude,release our egos. we can develop peace even with difficult people. It is always important to be positive and forget the past. If we can develop peace in our relationships, it will definitely make a big difference to our lives.

Live, Laugh, Love



Albert Einstein vs Twin Flames


Stick and stones can break your bones but words can never hurt you,,, Who in the world came up with that? I’ve had stitches, Ive had surgery, Ive been Abused, the pain from that I dont remember nearly as much, those memories fade with time, however Words can stay with you for lifetimes,Through my Journey in this life I have gone through many changes, I have been emotionally dead and reborn, spiritually dead and reborn and I truly believe Physically dead and reborn. The thought brought me to when I was in a very bad place in my life, my past choices and behavior brought me to a changing point, it was a swim up river and survive or roll over and give up and stay miserable choice, The choice seems obvious does it not? Well at the time, hell I wasn’t so sure, Thats when I had a visit from my Twin Flame, The very one I had been through Hell and back with many times, the very one I manipulated, lied to and deceived, The very one who had lied to me and deceived me, at this point in our journey, he was standing in his truth!  I was not. In this most painful visit the words he spoke to me hurt me worse than if he would have just smacked me, the pain from the smacking would have subsided, however the words lived on, they stayed inside of me, is it not how that usually works?


His words were an actual quote from Albert Einstein himself, he said to me, do you know what the definition of insanity is? I said yes I believe I do, But he proceeded to tell me anyway. He said Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again expecting different results! He then went on to tell me what we were trying to do was insane, we had been through so much, we had tried, and tried again, and then tried again, to make our relationship work, and yet there we were,what we both thought was an ending point. I took his words and for days cried and feeling he was right because who could argue Albert Einstein? I had quite a few dream Journeys in which I had visits from my father, who had passed years before,and he asked me a very profound question. He said Kid, what would happen if you took the words “same thing” out of that, what if you tried something different perhaps then you could expect different results! I woke up with a clear mind and I then made a decision to stand in my truth no matter what. I just remembered as my Twin Flame sat there across from me and said those words, I felt a vibrational pull like no other, I can remember even as the words flowed from his mouth that I would never be without him, I can remember feeling such a connection as he spoke words of an ending I was feeling a beginning.


The time rolled buy and I stood in my truth, my Twin had moved on with someone else I never as much as I tried could never not feel the pull toward him, I had moved on to a physical relationship with another, vowing to stay in my truth, I was able to let that person now i was connected to my Twin and always would be. A Vibrational pull so deep, so strong I felt him always, I felt him missing me, I felt him longing for me, I felt him denying himself, I felt him knowing he was no longer in his truth. I felt the pain i had inflicted upon him and the desire in him not to ever feel that pain again, all I could do is continue to stand in my truth, I knew the foundation of our Twin Flame Connection would take things from there, I am not sure what Albert Einstein knew about Twin Flames or about Vibrational energy, or a spiritual connection,but my Twin and I are one, our journey begins anew every morning when I wake up in his arms, Einstein was onto something with this definition. Our insanity was to ever try to be something we are not, was to ever try to not live to our full honest relationship, our insanity was trying to deny ourselves the connection, insanity was trying to pull against the vibrational frequency. Insanity was trying to live in this existence without standing in our truths together! If you find yourself inside the definition of insanity, Try something different, try standing in your truth, perhaps you will get the result your looking for, perhaps the result will exceed your expectation.


I don’t know who I am…. The open door to how you become a union!

Dear Twins Flames,

Because of the circumstances I find myself in I have had no choice but to speak to him about it as he is involved. When I do speak to him about it, he becomes very defensive and says it feels like I am blaming him, I am not blaming him. It isn’t anyones fault but it does need to be resolved. My twin doesn’t live with me, however he has his post delivered to this address because of his mail going missing. I have received letters that I have someone living with me because of the mail. I need to send evidence to prove that he lives at another address. This has proven difficult as all his mail is sent to mine. So he has had to contact his landlord for conformation, but its felt like I have had to prompt him to do so. This situation has been rather stressful for me as it affects my children, our home and financial situation too, no one is to blame for this but I am trying to get all the information together to send it off. This morning I spoke about it to him and he closed up, comparing me to ex’s that moan at him.

It feels like we bury our heads in the sand, it got to the point where I have been reluctant to speak about things because I dont want him thinking that im pressurizing him or forcing him to do something he doesn’t want to. I have realized that I should be able to freely speak about things without worrying over if it will cause a problem, I have done this for almost all of my life, never truly speaking because I am ridiculed if I do, I suppose the situation has pushed me into doing just that…

young-couple-back-to-backMy friend,

What you are experiencing is the egoic nature of being..  This realm as it were always causes the most difficult of circumstances.  You see it is because we follow thought pattern it never allows the development of something greater.  (Something greater is the same is the greater intelligence within you, your heartbeat, your lungs filling with air, being completely present to all things surrounding you in the moment.)  As you can sit and contemplate your thoughts about what starts to bother you, you lose this place in being thus losing the connection to your twin, thus making him responsible for your not being able to connect.) This unintentional act serves only the purpose to point you to the truth about the connection. It says what the mind can absorb or act within is the energy being done to keep you from each other.  Let’s take the thoughts about the mail coming and what it has done to you in a concern factor.  You say it has become stressful to the children, your home and financial situation.  No this is not about those things in fact those things are symptoms of the root that is creating conflict.  This conflict in it’s truth would ask you to sit with your children and share your truth about what you feel, whether it be hurt, angry, scared, etc…  Then allow through compassionate listening to let them share what they truly feel.  Children are a very illuminating truth to what they feel about anything.  Depending on the age they are in the world of form and can show you the individual design we have created in which we don’t connect.
So where these truths will place you is this…  What would it be to not bury your head in the sand?  What would it be like to let go of all the material content and just forgive in this moment as this moment is all you ever have.  Forgiveness in truth is giving up the hope that the past could be any different in this moment.  When you give this truth to yourself you are opening a door to a deeper foundation of love to yourself and to your twin.   Becoming his true friend, allowing him the place where you become silent and compassionately listen to him with no judgements gives him space to see himself any place you keep bringing a past or a future to in this listening will only be a mind interacting with another mind.  Remember the only way the mirror is truly in effect is when your able to clear your mind and keep it open without content, you allow the mind to create for you.  This when done without reason is when you inside of the truth comes to your twin and to yourself.  More so for yourself, you will smile because your sense of self is no longer under attack by your mind or his.  This is done in being in yourself as you haven’t created thoughts to keep you in the constant pain of attack by content the mind keeps you in survival and attack mode which is pain created by a mental position.   It takes great love which you possess to find the silence of the mind within you.  These things that seem painful are only painful in thought which that energy has to travel somewhere, it is as powerful as long as the thought process has the place in keep the fire in you going.  I hope this spoke to you inside as it is within you.  The union of twins needs this truth to birth and rebirth the truth of why you are here.     realize your truth my friend.. it is the pathway!

Is this why it doesn’t feel comfortable for me to be in this frame of mind, I am not used to feeling like this. My children are still young to understand so I cant speak to them about it.

So what you are saying to me is stay in the moment? To not think about the past or future? Have you got to the point now on your journey with your twin that nothing on the outside affects you? Am i standing in the way of myself here? One thing i realized not long ago is that it is me that runs…my twin just mirrors that..but I am the one that runs from myself. As soon as I allow my ego to get involved I drift away from myself. ..i then become confused…lost and unable to find myself… however each time this has happened I have found myself again.the love for myself is deeper than it was before…and so is the connection, is this the pattern of twins? Do we just need to let go of any material content in this experience and live within the connection regardless of the outside situation?

My friend,
You stated it is effecting your children is this not something they can hide easily?  Are they showing signs and you are interpreting these signs as a meaning that they are effected?
As twins within a union it has become easier to speak to each other and say my ego is in effect and here is what it wants me to stand in as a mental position.  An example, the energy of being insecure will seek out different ways to view each other and make this about the other rather than make this about our own mind dominant nature.  This becomes very aware of itself as a being that has either become very strong in stance due to abandonment issues, self esteem issues, the need to be right about being wrong.. etc.  This becomes very easy to see if you see yourself in the mirror.  You can’t hold your twin responsible for things you can’t see in yourself.
Being the runner is vital to see your actions in all things, you are still carrying the same process of thought from circumstances and actions that are still ringing in such a way that you make it a choice to do what you have always done rather than stand in the truth and not move from it.
The confusion energy is there to give the mind food to keep you guessing and as food it has a shelf life greater than you this is to keep you from your truth.  It will say he doesn’t care, or I am not good enough cause of his actions.  This confusion in energy does something very challenging cause you are not allowing the voice of your twin combined without your own to be heard.  This gives a vibration so it becomes the push or pull of what you feel inside and then your mind steps in as a translator to view from the place where the individual you exist in ego it has it’s mental position that needs to be right and keeps you in survival.  The only way to remove this or give it less power is to be ok with losing yourself and unable to find yourself.  For it wants to have the content of being yourself to be able to keep the mental position in ego to keep you suffering.  Do you understand this?
Losing yourself would you be of more love reinventing yourself or do you feel what you have grasped in content is only keeping you in a cycle of suffering.  Do you see what you say is losing yourself gives you a mental concept of going into a way of thinking that keeps the suffering alive.  Is it your choice to suffer?  Do you want you or your twin to suffer?  Do you see how listening deeply to each other with no content helps you to suffer less?  This is the path of twins it’s awakening is only as strong as you are able to continue to be ok with being lost and unable to find yourself.  This is when doors open and gifts emerge.