Im Marrying a Cheater!!!

 

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As a Child I dreamed of this Connection, a love no other seemed to believe in, I would daydream about a connection so deep that you could feel physical manifestations of the other person, I dreamed and dreamed and when I spoke of this great love i was shot down,”your living in a fantasy world”. “there is no such thing, its only in dreams”. So thats where I kept it, in my dreams,,,,,, I married for 13 years, it was a “normal” marriage, I divorced dated, and then 2 years of self discovery ended me up in a new city with a brand new start and a fresh outlook on life, and then,,,,,, it all started.

 

I met him, when I saw him, my heart knew something was different, my soul awakened, my eyes were gazing upon the most beautiful man I have ever seen. We spoke and his voice consumed me, his written words were poetry to my ears. The first time my eyes saw him My heart stopped beating for seconds, I could not breathe, Ill nervier forget the fist sight, he was standing/leaning against the back of his car at a place we had agreed to meet at, he wore business attire which He wore so sexy, he was certainly easy on the eyes, I Immediately felt unworthy, I felt this beautiful man could not be here to meet me, but he was and I was falling all over myself. We talked to get to know one another, and time stood still.

 

Time after time he would call the numbers still are etched in my soul when they would show up on the caller Id, my heart raced, my palms would sweat. He had done something to me, we would make plans to meet, always at my place and I would get so excited, I would make sure to be home earlier to shower and prepare myself for THIS meet may be “the one” because every time we met there was ALOT of kissing and making out, and oh my when we kissed it lasted for hours,and well as ironic as it was HE would not “put out”. He never left me unsatisfied, the passion so strong so amazing so deep, however it seems I was on a “mission”.

 

Let me go back for a second and describe a kiss, a kiss I have written about, and he has written about, a kiss so deep, a kiss that awakened that ‘DREAM” I had kept inside of me, I saw inside of his soul, I saw him and I knew he could see me, I knew he he could see “ME”. That scared the shit out of me, why wouldn’t it, I had lived a very messed up life, I had a lot of skeletons in my closet and this fine specimen of a man had the key to the damn door! Let me explain how that feel for those of you who dont know,,,,Its like a serial killer who had a ton of “evidence” in his house and the police were knocking on the door,,,, That kiss made my heart do flips, made my stomach turn in excitement and fear combined. When he left that day I was glad he was gone but never wanted him to leave.

 

The visits became less and less and my “mission” was not complete,,,, and then i began to put together pieces like a puzzle in my mind. He had asked me not to call him as it was a business phone and he got “charged” for calls. He only ever contacted me during the day “business hours”, we only ever met during the day, and his e mails were mostly his writings, writings of sexual nature, fantasies he had in his head, stories of passion and lust and love at first I felt as if he had just copied and pasted them but later I knew they were his writings. I sat in a sinking feeling,,,, he MUST be married.

 

He called for a “visit” and what some would call a “booty call” but i wasn’t getting any “booty”, but THIS was the visit I was going to complete my “mission”, This man who had such a great impact on my soul, I knew was “shady” I know was lying, I had to put my DREAM, back inside of myself, lock it back up and just complete my mission,,,,,, always wondering WHY he would not go all of the way with me? Was i not good enough? Was I not sexy enough? Was I not worthy? Did he have a disease? Did he promise himself he would “play around” but never really go all of the way out of respect for his wife IF he had one? WHY???  What was the problem,,,, I asked him in an e mail, Are you HIV Positive? he laughed and said no im not, I have a clean bill of health,,, so the mission was reinstated,,,, and the visit came and through some really tough persuasion HE gave in to my “persuasion” and mission accomplished. When he was about to leave I looked into his eyes, something was different, something had changed in him, he left and I knew at that moment I would not be hearing back from him. I went on with my life so I thought, there were times I missed him, when the phone rang I would hope, I checked my e mail,, nothing, The only breakdown I had was one fall day,,September 26th 2005,

 

I had confronted him in e mail about his lies,days before, explaining to him what i saw,,, all the signs of a married man,,,,his response was another “fantasy” written out, he avoided my comments and my questions, he was exposed so divert my attention he “thought” he would grab my attention with another writing, I was livid, i was angry, I was hurt and I drove, I drove out to a place very special to me, a Big deck over a lake in a State park, a Deck my Grandpa and my Father had a part in building as a “Community service” project. I went out there often, and although it had been rebuilt a couple of times since then I still feel the craftsmanship my Grandfather put into everything he did. I got there, the wind was chilly, it was almost dark, I listened to the squirrels run around in the leaves, I saw a rabbit, I was a fish jump in the water and I began to cry, I began to scream out loud,,,, WHY ARE YOU LYING TO ME? WHY ARE YOU SO DIFFERENT? WHY CANT I STOP FEELING YOU?? WHO ARE YOU AND WHY DID YOU COME INTO MY LIFE? I HAVE HAD ENOUGH HURT I DONT NEED YOURS!!! IF YOU CAN FEEL ME STOP LYING TO ME AND COME TO ME,,, EXPLAIN THIS FEELING I HAVE EXPLAIN WHY I CAN SEE INSIDE OF YOU!!!  COME BACK TO ME SO WE CAN FIGURE THIS OUT,,,,,  CAN YOU HEAR ME,,,,, I screamed until my throat hurt and I felt as if my tears would flood the lake, I watched as they hit the water down below and I felt as if I was fighting a losing battle, The Universe had played a very bad trick on me.

 

From that moment on everything with his was a game to me, I just knew he was different, the way he touched me, the way he spoke to me, they way he looked at me, the way we connected.

I had to let it go, I had to put this awakening feeling back inside of me, and I did, and i eventually went on with my life and I was right that was the last time I saw him, The time I was able to “complete mission”.The e mails got fewer and fewer. I did not need all that in my life, I met someone else and got engaged, and then out of nowhere a YEAR later a message,,,,A simple how are you doing message and then come everything flooding inside of me,,,HOWEVER  attached with those feelings were hurt and doubt, and A lot of doubt inside of me,,, wait if I can still have “these” kinds of feelings for someone else how could I marry someone? I was a mess inside and it was really all his fault!! Why did he come back into my life?

 

For months we met and talked and time stood still, but this was different as I was on a path of self destruction, it was me against everyone who had ever hurt me, and I grew into something just as bad as I felt he was, He was trying to stand in his truth, trying I say because he was not but I was getting answers, and I loved being in his presence It awakened me further, and the darkness got deeper as I knew he could see me so I had to find deeper places to hide it. I found out that my suspicions were warranted,he was married, however he had not lived with his wife for years, but had lived with someone else for nearly 9 years, so he had a wife AND a live in girlfriend, funny thing though he was still sleeping with his wife,and was lying to her and telling her he loved her and she had hung on for him all those years, all the while living another life with someone else,, and me well I was only one of MANY, he had on the side of his wife and live in girlfriend,in my eyes at that time he was a gorgeous, sexy, womanizing player! But I loved him, however so did many others, I found out he was sending them all the same “fantasies” all the same deep writings, all the ‘lines” only 1 thing was different,,, He would not be intimate with me in entirety. He was living out fantasy in each and every  woman he was with looking for different pieces of his puzzle, looking for something different in each one, he was looking for “himself”. He was hurting so many, and the big picture was the hurt he was doing to himself,,,

I watched him go through a change so deep, I watched as he confessed everything to me, I let him cry, I loved this man, I realized at this moment I was deep in love with him, but my mind would tell me over and over there was ALOT of women in love with this man! All I could do was be his friend, and go on with my life, so I was his friend and i stayed his friend as I watched him cry and confess and do it again to another woman and again to another one, and I watched as he witnessed me “feeling” his pain, I watched him and loved him as his wounds were deep, and his change was hard, he was lost. I knew I could never be with him really,,,Once a Cheater always a Cheater right??? We would confess our love for one another and we would in turn hurt one another.

 

I knew I could never really “be” with a man like this, I could never trust him, I cold never believe in him, again once a Cheater,,,,I married and it was a lie, I was not in love with him, I loved him, But I was not in love with him, I did it out of hurt,I just wanted to be loved and be the “only” one in someones life, and I knew I would have this from this man, I didn’t want to live a life of non trust, already we were connected though I could not deny that, however he would confess his love for me and the same night I could FEEL him with someone else. The Pain was hard to handle, it was unbearable, So perhaps marrying someone else was a way to throw that pain back at him, In turn I realize I was hurting a lot of people as well, I had become him, he just didn’t know it!

 

My Marriage was a mess, no wonder, I was in love with someone else and we communicated daily, We remained friends, as my marriage fell apart, In a night of hurt and to much alcohol I slept with my husband who I was already estranged from, and we conceived,,, I met with my friend and he is the one who told me i was pregnant he could see it in me. It was true, So I was living a lie with a man who I was about to have a child with, and he was still sleeping with others, still lying to his wife, and his live in girlfriend. At one point he had told me to just “come on” just come and be with him and he would raise my child as his own and we would just be in love,,, I thought about it over and over and after an argument with my husband I left and went to him, when i got to his home before I got to the door, I saw in the window and he was in an embrace with his girlfriend and they kissed, i never knocked i went him to my husband, it was what it was, we loved one another deeply but the hurt was to much, but I TRUSTED my husband and I needed that !

 

My friend and I barely spoke during my pregnancy we e mailed a bit and spoke on messenger a bit, but the communication was no where near as before,, He sent my son a gift in the mail and

we just remained friends,,,and just as fast as communication diminished it picked backup again, only this time it was a bit different he was different and I could see something about to happen, I wasn’t sure what. We met and we were “together” only this time beautiful and it was life changing and I knew he was someone I could never be without even if not physically, we were spiritually connected, we loved one another and it was evident.

 

 

We got closer and closer and I knew he was still lying and seeing others, this player was good, I had dealt with a “couple” of the women he hurt and they told me the same stories, “he said that to me too, yes he told me that too!”  uggg this man was toxic!!  and then,,,His mother was found very ill, and I watched him as he lost his mother, it was a very painful time for him, I just remained his friend, I went to the service, sat in the very back row, I just wanted him to know  I was there for him, I didn’t stick around, I left directly after. I saw him the next week and I saw something in him I had not seen before, It was different ! He cried to me, he broke down and the next few months were hell. i watched him die, I watched him split, I watched him fight and struggle, he was honest with his girlfriend who had since moved out, he actually told her he was deeply in love with me and he was direct.

 

He then went through something really really amazingly painful but so beautiful! He was honest with his wife and he started the process of divorce, my husband had long since moved out and finally just simply asked me “why aren’t you with him?” Did I mention my ex husband is a great man? SO we did it we made a go of it but did I trust him?? HELL NO!  when he stated he was in a meeting I requested a “picture” of this said meeting and he always accommodated and he understood!  What we had not addressed was the skeletons I had in my closet!  at this point he was standing COMPLETELY in his truth,he was COMPLETELY honest with HIMSELF and with me about every aspect of his past and his life.

 

We lived together until MY skeletons began to come out and why would he stay with me after all he had been though why would he stay with me he was honest with me he deserved my honesty and i never gave it to him, we separated and he forgave me and we reconnected and it happened again months later and again he forgave me and we reconnected and again, it happened again and he left me, this time for good, I saw it in him, he tried to connect with someone else as did I, I went through the same pain he went through I had to find myself, I had to fall in love with MYSELF, I had to go not my pain.

 

Now as we are both in our truth from this 9 year Journey,, we have been back out to that deck together numerous times, He proposed to me on that deck, standing in the very same place I was screaming for him at, tears fell from both of our eyes in the same water. I am in love with this amazing man and I get to spend the rest of my life with him, We share EVERYTHING we hide nothing from one another, we share a cell phone, we share emails, we share face books, we are together nearly always and when we are not, those very same butterflies I felt in 2005, i feel today when he calls from the store, when he sends me a message from Face book when im sitting right next to him.

 

I trust this man with everything i have in me, I trust him in every aspect! I trust he will never lie to me, I trust I am and always will be his one and only, I trust everything he Says to me. I believe in him, I believe in the Business we have created out of our story and out of what the universe has asked us to do, I believe in myself, I believe our running and chasing was a lesson and our experiences have already changed lives.

 

I sit in awe of this AMAZINGLY gorgeous man everyday of my life, I watch him walk and I smile I watch him type on the computer and I feel lucky, I watched him sleep just last night and I cried, He really is a genuine person, he’s gorgeous, he’s incredibly sexy, he’s honest, he’s true, he’s loving, he’s romantic, he’s passionate,hes kind, he’s generous, hes giving, he provides for us, he’s a wonderful father, he’s compassionate,and he loves me unconditionally and I love him unconditionally, I love him for what he’s been through, what we have been through, and the universe is now allowing us to teach from it.  The honeymoon stage is never ending, inside of me I still have those “forever” butterflies. The dream inside of me is awake and WE ARE LIVING IT! Relationship Reinvented was born from this connection.

 

The old Quote “Once a cheater always a cheater”  could be true, My cheater, CHEATED CHEATING do you understand that????,By going inside of the root of WHY he was choosing those actions, WHY he was hurting people. He went INSIDE, he in a sense took his own life,HE CHEATED CHEATING! and I have this wonderful man in my life, he is still a cheater, he cheated his pain out of staying alive, he cheated his story out of Defining him, He cheated everyone who knows him out of being able to say, “hes still the same old guy” “believe me he’s still lying and cheating”, anyone who knows him now and knows him then is no longer able to say that because they can see it in him! They can see by his actions and his energy that part of him no longer exists. He has cheated that quote out of being true!!   I was on that deck on September 26th or 2005 screaming for him,,,, and I will be back on that deck September 26th of this year Marrying this Cheater and I am the Luckiest Woman in the World!

I Love You Clark Kent

Love Lois

 

Relationship Reinvented on tour….

 

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We are currently doing wonderful things in Relationship Reinvented to include our sessions, root camp and we are certifying coach’s!

Twin Flames Lee and Sherry are doing Soul Connections and Sacred Relationships seminar discussions about what these are and why they are here in this world.  The tour kicked off with our first at Consciouscon.com which was done in Cincinnati Ohio with other guest speakers such as Matt Kahn and Panache Desai.

 

If you are interested in joining us please send us an email or follow the links below.  You can also email us at RelationshipReinvent@me.com

 

Relationship Reinvented Tour

Our Journey

Find Yourself

RelationshipReinvetedFacebookPage

Our Google Plus Page

Our Group for Relationship Reinvented

Our Group for the Twin Flame Support

 

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The Human Condition of connection!

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The Human Condition….

 

It always has been a question of can I be connected to someone who is not who I am.. This comes in the forms of! Can I be connected to someone who is a different color, different religion, the same sex, an opposite eye color, different age, on the other side of the earth, etc…

Why did this happen or was it something you didn’t pose to look at from outside the human condition?

The human condition is to not see from the eyes of what is different from you, but rather experience the vibration and what it wants you to see from without seeing it from the human existence we have been told to see from. Where on earth are we told not to pay attention to our history, our future, never truly directing us to our present moment which is all we have!

If you are to experience this connection without thinking in presence, you would be headed in the right direction. This connection doesn’t see in those ways, it actually sees from beyond it, all deeply within it deeply in this moment!

It has a vibration frequency all it’s own. It knows of itself as the one soul coming back into what split in the way that it did. If you were to see a big huge ball of energy and it split and then one would say go into a rock and the other into a Steel ball. As it would become separate from it’s original source it would still know it is connected to something beyond its new form so to speak.

Yet when it comes into the frequency of itself by seeing each other or being in the same space without time it would know that it was connected directly no matter what the cover or shell looks like.

It happens much like this in what we experience in this world! Connection doesn’t know what it is by what the outside characteristics are, but it does know what it is from the inside. It knows itself. It knows if it comes from the place where it was connected to be one. Notice the word here “One” It is not that it becomes whole without the other, it is whole in any case. The once combined energy or soul knew what it was without any distinction of what it was or is in the now! It knows something more impactful, it knows home!

Home has no dominion and has no need to be explained here. Only it knows itself and is most in it’s depth of inner peace which needs no expression. The emotional response is the human condition which is able to elect unconditional peace without the human condition attached.
So if you are in question of what you are in connection, don’t go into the condition of human, go into the unconditional truth of knowing. This is what the unknown traveller (soul spark) in it calls to within you. The knower in you knows that you are to experience the human condition, yet it doesn’t need to make it the soul truth of knowing. Your knower knows this more so when you go into your knowing knows this! Due to the worldly human condition we experience that makes us so justified in judgment of what we are in human, the souls only presence is to be silent until we all see into our truth the gravitational pull to know within our knower is this has never had anything to do with anything being different, whether in sight, smell, taste, touch, hear and mainly your six sense of knowing! Enduring the challenges of mind interacting with mind and how it spawned ego to keep us chasing a dream state that says we can be connected. You are connected in your truth. Which if you have been on this site and gone into’s it’s depth you have found not just your truth which this was placed here for you to find. It was placed here to point you deeper into your knowing.

So can your twin flame, your soul mate, or any other measurement in connection be something of someone different! Of course the vibration itself is the answer not what your mind makes of it, but how it awakens the traveller within you in knowing to seek deep inside yourself to place you in standing in your truth.

Love deeply,

Your soul!

Can you shut off your emotions?

Do you have a switch and wonder how you can shut off your emotions!

i ignore it

Take a look here!
https://plus.google.com/u/0/events/c8152s2jsos2g6r5vf7lqo5278g

Eye C U vibrational unconditional love!

 

Eye see you vibrational unconditional love

Vibrational Energy of unconditional love

What is this exactly, well it is the true source of what the statement above implies, what we don’t see about this in energy is what this does to us without seeing it in truth.

The vibration we experience that rattles us into being always gets a push outward we don’t see how this pushes us inward. The echoes of what we become by the story we have kept inside causes this path and that path to keep us from being.

See this as a chime of sorts, we can hear it outside and dont really hear it from inside the chime, where the ringing is even louder.

If that wasn’t enough then see how this energy of connection does this to the liberty bell, the size is enough to see and hear the ringing for miles away and inside the bell is such a vibration going on, the shear age of the liberty bell matters not for the ringing and vibration continue even after can no longer hear it, how long do you think that happens? It happens for moments we don’t see because we live mainly outside ourselves in the illusion we are not able to experience what is inside of us.

So when you find a great love how does this show up when your bell is rung, it is ringing outward and we don’t see the obstacles of vibration that it has to get around inside because of the traveling done to reach our core as it does start to ring from inside you. It does get to the core that is why we lose so much in time, we start creating a thought process of how this will either be right or how this will be completely wrong.

Most who are in the despair of darkness can’t see the light, not even seeing that they are the light, and you shine this inward, you separate the being, from the ego which ignites the ego stronger creating a false self that says almost anything and everything. You can see the truth about what obstacles your story has created and you carry that, some even make the statement I have been healed!

The story is what you say inside yourself and give permission to the word healing. All healing happens and it is always on going, other than that it can lie dormant with a distorted view of what the condition are that are keeping you from cementing in unconditional love.

True love happens with the word that is first in it, true which is truth. Here is where the ego keeps you locked away from paradise and it keeps this as way to keep you from yourself and your true radiant place in being.

You have to unlock the truth and see that healing is what the word implies, you heal in past and in future always in the present moment. What you don’t hide is brought into the light and what you don’t keep locked away can no longer keep the story as the same story!

Many come and see that work has to be done, and when they go into themselves they see the deeper meaning beyond how the world of healing gives you to your true state of being. If you embrace the truth, then it renders what you see in the world as your illusion so much is granted in how you can unlock everything. Including the impossible!
How do you experience true unconditional love, is there conditions keeping you from truly seeing it and do you see that seeking this outside is hindered by the inside of you that has to go through all of the story to reach you?

What if the truth was that all positive and negative energy has created the path for you to see this more clearly in going in and doing the work to make the bell ring even deeper to feel your truth in connection. We can keep this lock on so long before it does the echoing needed to shine the radiant true love you can experience.

How do you unlock your truth? How do you keep your secrets hidden? What would happen to you if what you said was healed inside had to be gone into again to see yourself more clearly? How much love would you send out then without the variables of obstacles that can open you to the truth?

How much love would you embrace if you could be more transparent to see it ringing within you!

Love deeply,

Your soul!

Our Deep Sincere Thanks!

 

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There comes a time in your life when you take a look at where you are in that particular moment, We have had quite the Journey as most of you have read most of our blogs and know we have a connection so strong, so honest and so True it withstood everything the universe threw at us. We are Now Living a True Twin Flame Union, Inside this Union we have no choice but to teach, learn and guide others going through any type Relationship Issues. We tend to not lean on our College education or even what we absorbed from our Certification courses, we coach and guide from our one soul. We were led to make this our life’s work, and going in without fear proved difficult however we do what we are led to do, we enjoy it, and we appreciate it.

 

Looking at where we are now simply amazes us. We have such an amazing growing client base and when its time for them to fly, they fly and always keep in touch with us and sometimes even find they need a little more guidance and we are always here. Recently we have noticed such a spike in our e mail box and our Facebook group is growing by 50+ daily. No doubt we have our clients do their own work and sometimes its very uncomfortable and even painful but the result is Peace, and Unconditional love.

 

The loving support and Beautiful words sent to us daily from our Clients and friends confirms to us we are doing what we are called to do. Yesterday was an especially amazing day when a Client of ours found out we were getting Legally Married this fall,we have always been married in our souls and feel it is time to take the step here and have a Twin Flame Ceremony 🙂

What she did for us we will never forget and we are still in awe. She posted in our group and on our page, a page for all of our friend to see and so they are all able to assist in this ceremony. The tears this gave us were of deep bliss!

 

What a gift to have a ceremony touched by all of our friends from all over the world. Saying Thank You does not feel like it is enough, its not about the ceremony for us, it is all about the marriage and with this blessing the ceremony will be more beautiful than ever and will certainly be recorded and shown all over the world to show those who are experiencing the same journey we were on that there is healing ahead.

 

We are blessed to have all of you as Clients, Friends and Family.

Here is the page she posted!

http://www.gofundme.com/TwinFlameWedding 

Love

Lee and Sherry (Lois and Clark)

How deep is your Trust? Healing series 2014 March – Trust!

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Broken Trust?

I can’t forgive you…  I can’t be with you… I can’t do this anymore…  I can’t..  Whatever this is has a way of bringing you to a very shaky foundation in trust… We use these words in ego to signify that something in us is broke.  When you become unstable in this way of trust the choice to make the right decision always will seem as though you are teetering from what is hindering destiny from coming to you…  I can’t is the same as I won’t or the other words that follow such as i’ll try, or I am potential… the trust in all of this is on shaky ground. Isn’t it?

 

I have doubt, is also apart of trust.  When you trust something will fail!  What does it show you in the end that is the truth about what you said it would do happens…and…. FAIL will not abandon you!  Then that what you said becomes that you were right!  Is that what you are saying inside? A majority of us do!  What about when you say I have been let down by others… Is this trust as well.  Yes it is, because you are trusting that this will always be what you will receive outside you, don’t worry it does!  Trust is a very powerful energy!

 

 

I have been through trust training and I realized that I didn’t trust a thing years ago and still didn’t wake up to it..  You can tell how much you trust when you do the trust fall… You always fear that someone will not catch you, and you will hit the ground, and get hurt.  Sound like some choices you keep making in your existence here?

 

Another is the blindfold lead where someone is leading you and has to direct you with their common sense of directions..  The failure in that is that they can’t see what sinkholes are placed cause they are trying to get you through the trees… Someone who is completely aware of your path by leading this in front of you will always tell you the truth.  They will endure the path with you and not lead you astray…. Do you see how this can be difficult without trust?  Especially if they are not having you walk without them directly in front of you.  How will they ensure you won’t get hurt if they are not willing to walk the path with you?  Pay attention, the message here is deep!

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The awakened truth about trust is that you trust you have one more day to do something significant, you have one more moment to make a difference in your own being and yet we all get caught up by the same choices doing the same thing over and over again.  We find comfort in this energy of doing the same thing cause we trust it!  Having the same thoughts, we trust nothing changes so it doesn’t.

 

When I decided that I was going to live in truth I realized that I didn’t trust… I didn’t trust I would be accepted for the truth and it proved me right.  I wasn’t accepted… It wasn’t until I realized that being in my truth needed my trust just as much as I needed my love to get me through this broken trust.  The conditions of what my love gave me were without trust.  Do you see how unconditional love is?  It needs the very thing you won’t give to break you free of what you don’t give to yourself.  Telling my truth should their be conditions of who I can tell or what I can do with what I trust?  The answer was always no!  I had to trust that telling my truth was going to show that I am very truthful. I will call out to the truth and trust that the truth finds me more truth.

 

 

When I was abandoned and I abandoned others, was it related to trust.  Yes, I didn’t trust myself and in turn didn’t know in truth if I could trust others.  I didn’t know if I spoke from my pain if I would be accepted I trusted I wouldn’t!  If I could be damaged could I trust that I would be loved unconditionally? Can you?  I realize now that was just a lie that I was living inside myself that gave me the ability to walk away so easily from others.  Not wondering if they hurt by my actions, not wondering if I was indeed loving enough to let them go.

 

I let go, because I couldn’t face my own pain, but I could surely see my pain in others, whether I caused it or not.  I wanted to fix their pain and bring them into a world of imagination where no pain could harm them.  Not seeing that I trusted that I could do this, I was able to for a short while.  Then I knew that my own pain would infect them somehow, they couldn’t see the truth about my not trusting that they could feel anything remotely like what I felt inside.  Maybe it was that I was too genuine in my imagination, or that I was not standing in my truth enough for it to be genuine.  When I felt what I felt deeply, I realized that without me trusting that the right thing would come to me something else would come to me, and show me that this was just my imagination of the lie that made it possible to not tell the truth, I trusted this as my truth, that the lie was always right. Trust is intent… get it?

 

As humans we experience so much of what we hear inside that we isolate ourselves and miss the truth about trust.  Trust that you will be hurt and you will, trust that you will not be loved and you won’t.

 

Trust that you are not worthy of a deep love and yes you will get what you say in trust.  Trust that no one can hear you screaming inside and on one will.  Trust is the intent of what you want to have whether truth or a lie to find you and it does.

 

If you say you can feel another’s heart beat in your own as your truth and trust that what you feel in that heart beat inside you will find you then trust that it will completely!  No hesitation for that hesitation gives you the same in the trust you placed into it!

 

If you say you want to be in a truthful deep love relationship, trust completely that it will find you!

 

If you say you want to love yourself without conditions then trust that you will.  Without the words that I started with, it is always going to be a very confusing energy till you decide that you want the complete trust of what it is that you say you want!   Then make that the reason in being for that trust to give you what you know is in truth yours to give to yourself.

 

If you are having a hard time and want peace then trust you will find complete peace.  Any voice in you that says, “Yes but”.. Is a hole in that trust that says I am not enough yet.. where the lie is embedded is the truth waiting for it to see itself.  Say in self to the lie, “you will no longer tell lies for the heart that beats does so in a trusting manor, and that trust is something that I believe in.” Give yourself the wholeness in asking for trust to give you the truth about how you trust and it will give this to you when it is without question.

 

 

 

Love deeply….  Trust and let it find you!

 

Clark

 

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