Dear Clark, I dream of Love. I’m having some of my needs met emotionally by a lost love.
Clark: (Your needs aren’t met from someone, your attention to the need inside you is captured together with another.)
Dear Clark, I know that I can’t love him in this life. He can’t love me in his life either. Yet, we need each other. I left my husband two weeks ago, and I came back to him. My lost love totally understood. The lost love is my twin flame. I want to love him. He wants to love me, but our conscious keeps us in our immediate lives.
Clark: Your unconscious state keeps you in limbo you mean?
Dear Clark, We know we have love. We know that we love each other. But we can’t be together. It would hurt too many people. We hope that someday we can love each other. Be together. Unfortunately, it probably will never happen. We can dream though. Is it wrong? The way we feel?
Clark: Your love is neither a consequence or a painful experience… both of these are secondary, the truth is always your primary. There are truths about what love unlocks and keeps locked away within us. To experience a great love gives love to heal in ways that is neither dark nor sinister just freedom of what your existence can be. Love has a very unique advantage it sees pain as a threshold to more love. In this case, if it is true love it will seek out and find a way to come whether you go willingly or not. Usually in a dream state. You see what becomes a secret never allows love to become the pure place of truth within you and within the other that shares this love. You will always carry this burden with you. The greater the love calls to the inside of you, the more you are going to hurt those that you love as well. You see love is the truth it has it’s ability to create more love, not hate, or hurt as it seems. If your love has happiness within it, wouldn’t that be contagious? I am being direct about this, for it seems that to run from pain keeps you in pain and facing pain keeps you in pain and all of this because you don’t chose love. The freedom of love is in truth. Run from this and you get more pain. Yet you can always go through the threshold of pain with the truth that love gives you!
I am going to give you an example of how truth can see you free.. then you make a decision but realize that the impact of this decision carry’s the utmost truth. There will only be the place I point in the long term.
10 year old Clark sees his parents who have been together 15 years of marriage.. he sees them as a unit of who produced him. He will not only take what his father teaches him, he will take what his mother instills in him as well. He sees his father not really there all the time always working and supporting the family and his mother to. However he sees them with very little interaction. They seem to get along ok, at times, but other times he never sees them kiss or hug or hold each other. As he becomes 16, and his parents are still together he sees them even more individually as he did before. He finds his first girlfriend, and spends time with her, and may even lose his virginity behind closed doors.. yet his ability to show her any kind of affection based on time, slowly dies out, as time goes on. This could be for months, even years, in some cases.. Yet he feels something empty inside himself, he never truly feels connected, and probably won’t think about it. For this is what Clark sees as normal in the stream of energy he was presented with in his parental unit.. It isn’t what he was shown.. it was what he wasn’t shown.
Now let’s say Clark has the same circumstances and his parents split. On one end his mother has found a blissful connection that always gives her the strength to give Clark what true love is, there is kissing, holding hands, attention to each other in eyes connecting that he can experience.. and let’s say his father does this as well or even less let’s say his father doesn’t.. Clark will now have a view of what happiness can bring and what true love is cause he feels it from the connection that is shared with both parents. It is more love than he had previously and more than that it is something that he still will feel as he has his connection out there. He sees the purpose of something magic in it’s form. There are 9 billion people on this planet doing this very thing in this very moment. Never making a decision to grow their love, rather they stifle it, cause it is to save others from pain.. yet never showing them that love can heal anything. Truth is the thing we run from. It is never going to be that until you face the truth in you. You will always be wondering what if, and you will hold your current partner responsible for this, if you are unhappy and know it. How fair is that? It’s truly not. The truth sets you free. If you have your twin flame within distance and are not making the connection and it’s gifts a priority by falling in love with the true places in you. Then how can you give that to your friends, your family and even more yourself. You never have to second guess yourself. You second guess love by placing your thoughts in it. Remember you are connected beyond what others think, beyond what others can feel. And you run from ever showing them it’s possible. Do you see how you change everything in that future moment. It is that moment right here and now. You get to make this a choice by realizing how much love you have in you that will be locked away from a lie you have to tell yourself cause you no longer feel the love in you to know what love is.
Your primary purpose is to enable consciousness to flow into what you do. The secondary
purpose is whatever you want to achieve through the doing. Whereas the notion of purpose
before was always associated with future, there is now a deeper purpose that can only be found
in the present, through the denial of time.
Your secondary or outer purpose lies within the dimension of time, while your main purpose is
inseparable from the Now and therefore requires the negation of time. How are they reconciled?
By realizing that your entire life journey ultimately consists of the step your are taking at this
moment. There is always only this one step, and you give it your fullest attention. This doesn’t
mean you don’t know where you are going; it just means this step is primary, the destination
secondary. And what you encounter at your destination once you get there depends on the
quality of this one step. Another way of putting it: What the future holds for you depends on
your state of consciousness now.
Do you see how you have made a enemy out of what if’s and have lost precious time on how love can truly impact your existence. How much love can you take in one single step? It isn’t about hurting others it is about the truth in love that sets you free!
Here is how the mind has you both trapped in what you are doing… I can dream of this and never have it, isn’t that false love? You dream of something someone is and yet you create other things about them that may never resonate in a dream world that is left with you never experiencing it other than dreams you have inside you. There is where the lie is! It is staring you in the face. The truth is here and now, where is your love? Will it grow from this moment or will you keep it from growing living inside of a lie?
Lying to ones self is a sure fire way into making an enemy out of all relationships, most importantly to include the relationship with yourself. It will not matter which, for you are never genuine when you make it about everyone outside you who can’t see the real you that will emerge from being the more that you are in love. Do you see the point?
The point is what love is in connection only opens your eyes to heal with love all things outside of the connection to make it connect. Your mind tells you this is impossible. Yet isn’t your mind in control of what is possible in pain? Isn’t your mind the decision device that you use to keep you from death in any moment. Love is a feeling that guides you to truth and when you live in truth you give love more freely!
If you would make this decision of being more happy by yourself then chose this over being with someone who only fills partial needs. These needs are not really needed by you, they are telling you the false is always going to be your destiny. It is how it keeps you in bondage from truth. A lie is always best when it is influenced by circumstances. A circumstance is that you will never have the love you deserve because you will hurt others in your choice. A choice is never a consequence when you commit completely, it is love in motion! How else would you have learned to walk after crawling?
I hope this gave you something to ponder on and make it this moment.. Remember your love is inside you, if you underestimate it then everyone else will.
Again I will tell you pain is the pushing threshold to love.. What gives great pain will have a love like no other when it comes to you in that moment.
125 thoughts on “Dear Clark, I can’t be with my twin flame….”
That my friend was a very powerful and moving post! Kudos and thank you for sharing it… 🙂 one of your best and a classic!
My friend… You always are beyond your form even in your comments.. I appreciate that about the energy you always bring to light. 🙂 Clark
Love deeply, think deeply…use the heart and soul you have..and all will be revealed. Thank you for this very thoughtful post Clark. ..Gem 🙂
Thank you Gem, it is wonderful to hear from you! 🙂
Thank you. I have neglected some of my fav blogs lately as I have been so busy with University work and placement. I have a few weeks holiday to enjoy at last, so I can catch up! 🙂
Welcome home! 🙂
My twin flame stops himself from being with me. We get together for a few days then he does something to jeopordise it, hurts me in a big way then withdraws. Then the dust settles and he comes back. This time he hurt me so much when after a long break, I let him back in my life (I say let, but it is a magnet..) then he dropped me after 5 days. Emotionally I nearly died. I do not know how I managed to function after that and move at the same time. It was almost as if he wanted the ‘crash’. I was not going to contact him, but I did so that I had a chance to speak. I tried to explain that what he did was unacceptable, the way that he promised me everything then broke the love. He had no idea of the pain that I had gone through, how hard it was and claimed that he did nothing to hurt me. For me now, I am bewilderded. I can’t go back to that. I will process this alone and move on. The magnet is there again. It is hard. I asked him, when are going to get out of your cage and love me? Anyway, all I can do is get on with my life, but the deep truth is that I love him. It is up to him now. We lived minutes away from each other…I was there on a plate. NowI have moved far away.
My friend… I can only tell you that he has suffered abandon in his life to those that loved him unconditionally.. He leaves as easy as he will come into your life. You see what is the mirror effect in him is the crying that you are doing. The closer he will get to you the more he will run from you and himself. It isn’t that he can’t love you, he can’t heal to love you the way he should. It is not an energy you can see in this way as the emotional part creates a thought process that can’t see himself living in the understanding that he needs to forgive the unforgivable in himself and what has happened to him and the place that he sees as purpose to keep running he will never place himself in that position again. To stop and allow the chance of being hurt again is the cycle I am pointing to. It is the reason to keep the mind activated to run.. You never see this as keeping the pain alive until you face that you are in pain and heal what you are that is screaming for it inside of the pain. I am not sure if this makes sense for you, but the forgiveness you already have within you needed to see this to explain why you place yourself in arms way again and again. It is a choice, he can’t see it, but you can help him to see. He is repeating the cycle cause he won’t stop to embrace the pain as a threshold to finally be with the place inside him where love is pure. I hope this speaks to you!
Thank you Clark. This makes sense what you say. On my part, each time he lets me down triggers the neglect and abandonment in my own life, so I despair. Deep wounds that have laid dormant for years are open to the full, that I can only ask for God to take me in his arms as there is nowhere else to turn. This is a pain that I have tried to clear and heal for a long time, even before I met my TF. I can feel the wound, but don’t now how to fully repair. The pain of not being loved enough. The TF has, like a skilled swordsman, cut me where there was old debris, which I then went onto fix. I build myself up…but now it is too much. Even today, despite moving 100 miles away last week, I can feel his love beaming onto me. Yesterday I saw him dressed as an angel flying over my head!! It is so frustrating. I can only sort out my own life, respect myself by keeping out of the firing line and try to bring love into my life through other ways. I wish so much though that love could find a way for us both….
The twin flame love has one thing to do my friend.. It is to point out the pain within you and push through what you resist persist. (this is the cycle again of why TF’s never cement.) What you can’t heal inside yourself in truth you will bury and leave for later thinking you will get to it in time. This is the same keeping alive that he is doing and now it would seem you to. As you both clash into each other you amplify the effect of what you haven’t forgiven to show the other the path. Unless or until you surrender to it or he does and allow yourself the embracing of what pains you to give to yourself by yourself and be in truth with the other you will continue. This is something that you experience alone because of the connection yet it some way it points to how to release and embrace all things. If this is not something you can see inside yourself then you have greater places in you to find that need your attention. Remember as your heart hurts so does your twin flames.. these pains although feel physical they are the reminder of the connection and it’s ability to bring you both to life or call you to your death if not paid attention to. Surrender to what pains you hold inside for you no longer hold them alone. You share in that.. Wishing love requires one wish in return from you. Give yourself the love you wish for… Do you understand that?
“What you can’t heal inside yourself in truth you will bury and leave for later thinking you will get to it in time.”
Such an interesting statement. I’ve been thinking about this type of delay for weeks now. Such thoughts – that I’ll heal some day but not today – they trap us for a lifetime.
Lilain – I understand. The pain and the building and becoming overwhelmed with what may even turn out to be progress. And, deep down, knowing that there is no such thing as escape. There are only levels of coping. The kinder you are to yourself, the more unifying that kindness will be.
Thank you for this. I need to try and forgive the unforgivable in my own life. I want to have a rich, beautiful life instead of running on empty. I have had enough. I feel that I have reached a crossroads in my life and I want to give myself the best.
Yes my friend… by doing just that, you will then be able to see what another can give you that should be more than you give yourself. It is how you embrace your wholeness that this gives you, what you were placed here to experience. 🙂
Thank you for this post. It is so incredibly helpful. Here I find myself both blessed and distraught by a sudden twin flame reunion, more electrifying than anything I’ve ever known. ~Suzy
This union gives you what you need and want the most… YOURSELF! 🙂 😉 thank you Suzy!
Dear Clark, Sometimes I feel others are reading my thoughts and sometimes I read others thoughts as well. I also feel strongly connected to other people that are not my twin flame … Is it normal? Most of them are going through the same twin flame experience as well.
I answered this and it turned out to be another blog which I am posting for you It is titled the divine truth twin flames….
http://wp.me/p2ML45-16p I hope this answered you Divine! 🙂
🙂 Thank You Clark
Do you feel the truth within you friend?
I do. Meeting my twin flame made me see everything in duality. I not only understand duality and the complements I live it and is at peace with it. I don’t complain anymore I realize everything serves a greater purpose and neither can exist without the other … I have move beyond duality now to oneness if that makes any sense… 🙂
It makes sense as you lose your mind you come to your senses… It’s the defining moment that you plunge through this beautiful space and unite to experience true space! As you can see from this it is understood! 😉
I have lost my mind… And I give my twin flame full credit for that 🙂 But the chaos has brought me peace 🙂
Yes but the chaos fire is the infinite passion combined for the twin souls to utilize intimately with no end… It is unbelievable and way past the imaginations of the mind construct!
I also felt a “bursting to life” through this connection and I see everyone more clearly. It is as though the truth of that one connection is a stream that leads to an ocean where we all dwell. I’ve found, as well, that if the pain gets to be too much and I block myself from that stream, I can’t reach the ocean anymore.
You have an aura of great peace and pain. Interesting!
The truth inside of any given being is that it is on a journey that contains a path at any given time, it is this path that can be defined by a persons existence as seen through the mind. Yet the mind always needs a process. When this process is broken so are the laws that process the parameters of how deep one can show or express love. The answers to that love have the ability to be found to awaken parts of the mind that seek itself. The depth of such a place has pure love capacity which has no limits it actually embraces this more than any process known to the mind that has been trapped. You can truly become the energy that is love itself. How is this the answer to what you seek? Well it just is only a place that goes beyond itself.
There is no answer truthfully that I can point to which is only this truth. A spiritual journey such as this heals the parts of you that you may or may not even realize have healed until this becomes true in you. The twin sparks this animated journey within you. You can share this with only that one being. I know that this question was on purpose. I have been asked why Men struggle on expressions of feelings. This can always be pointed to where it began as a child, a male will be told to think about his actions and a girl will be touched upon her feelings as to why she makes the choices she makes. Do you see the splinter?
This spiritual journey has led me to realize that this very thing splintered us as a communication that still suffers in such a way that we can’t even believe in a twin flame or even draw the understanding of it as men. You never want to hurt anyone.. you are born with that unless or until you get hurt. you find a thought process that repeats this cycle keeping it just as a strike of a cord would do on a guitar it echoes into the silence that makes us the thought process you will keep that keeps you from hearing anything else.
Is this not to be birthed in the spiritual journey we are all on?
Yes!!! You understand… That’s what I am talking about.. I wonder if it’s only the females this happen to… I have met a few females where I felt that connection with.. It’s like we are all synchronizing with each other even though we all live in different countries. I feel there pain as well, I had to block one of them because her pain was too much or something about it didn’t sit well with me. I think she knows I block her and is upset with me…. All this is new to me and I am uncomfortable with certain people accessing me like that.. I met another girl after the one I block and her energy was very comforting, during our conversations I actual took my mind off my twin flame completely and that’s rare for me… I really like her 🙂 she reminds me of me. She is very playful, open and a free spirit. Thanks for responding 🙂
I also felt a “bursting to life” through this connection and I see everyone more clearly. It is as though the truth of that one connection is a stream that leads to an ocean where we all dwell. I’ve found, as well, that if the pain gets to be too much and I block myself from that stream, I can’t reach the ocean anymore.
You have an aura of great peace and pain. Interesting!”
In Response to the above
Yes Chaotician !!! You understand… That’s what I am talking about.. I wonder if it’s only the females this happen to… I have met a few females where I felt that connection with.. It’s like we are all synchronizing with each other even though we all live in different countries. I feel there pain as well, I had to block one of them because her pain was too much or something about it didn’t sit well with me. I think she knows I block her and is upset with me…. All this is new to me and I am uncomfortable with certain people accessing me like that.. I met another girl after the one I block and her energy was very comforting, during our conversations I actual took my mind off my twin flame completely and that’s rare for me… I really like her 🙂 she reminds me of me. She is very playful, open and a free spirit. Thanks for responding 🙂
Clark did you experience the runner/chaser phase with your twin soul? If so, who was the runner and who was the chaser?
Both become that maybe not at the same time… We both did this my friend more than once and always for a deeper pain that was concealed how else does this combine. It was truly deeply a story beyond no other the more mountains we had to climb the more mountains arose.. You are always in that mirror of truth my friend all the lights want to come on… Did you both not experience this as well?
We have … I have recently surrender to the connection and waiting for the runner to return. At first I was afraid of the connection then I gave in and it was amazing for awhile but I felt a block in our connection. I could feel he was hurting, but whenever I brought up anything to do with feelings, he would shut down… However I kept pushing him to talk about his feelings until one day he shut down completely but I still felt him and I knew he was in pain.
He has a hard time talking about his emotions… He is very organize, conservative and practical while I am a free spirit and very in touch with my feelings.
The death of the former self my friend is that place… It is very painful to watch and experience you cling to the familiar which continues to fade into a deeper silence. Why not send him to me?
My friend this merits another unique answer as the light comes into placed inside yourself the cleansing experience of each form birthing the source soul stands clean while the other forms dissolve in love.. This is for you both for anything left unresolved or not communicated keeps you from cementing in the pure!
I recently stop trying to help him, I let him go completely. I even block him so I wouldn’t feel his pain. He needs to do his own work. By trying to help him I was hurting myself. He knows what he needs to do. He is a very intelligent guy and he does listen to my opinions. He just need time and I am fine with that… We will unite in divine timing.
The stronger the mind the more painful the fight that was me my logic was quite deafening to my true self… Men are confined in this as the mind dominance men are giving define the laws of ego… Not an easy task or easy for sight to see the place that is beyond it! Understood my friend but I am here should you need me.
Thank you so much. I appreciate that 🙂 and I enjoy talking to you. He is coming around I can feel it. I know he searching for answers so that’s a good start. He needs to find his own answers in his own way instead of taking my word for it. I think he is in shock.
Shock will still only point to the aftermath the mind can translate, do you see the truth in that cycle. I was given this gift of knowing to break this cycle… I know you think he will figure this out, yet I know how the mind is positioned to keep control! The feelings need protection for it was left open to pain experienced. I am here my friend or anyone who feels it yet can’t remove this very painful trust that your mind states you need. It is false I am proof of that.
I just want to say two things:
1) As a highly emotional man whose flame is the withdrawing and (seemingly) unemotional one (deep down tho her passions are as powerful as mine tho, which is probably what scares her the most actually), I just want to go on record as saying that the sex “roles” discussed above can often be reversed.
2) She may be running like mad, but even as she does so and I continue to patiently wait for her to open up, I revel every day and in every moment in the unconditional love that now permeates my life and manifests itself in myriad ways. What else can I do? Wallow in the “woe is me” mindset? Heck, I did that over her years ago; this is much more productive and rewarding, wouldn’t you say?
I most certainly would say… I have been exactly where you are my friend.. and yes to include the timeline maybe even longer. 🙂 I am so glad to meet you my dear friend. I at first felt from writing such a thing that men were not at all able to fathom what was placed here. Thank you for proving me incorrect.
You’re welcome. 🙂
@John Difool. I agree with the role reversal im female and the runner (like mad) if he said something id shoot him down without even thinking about it. I pretended to be cold even though im highly emotional and a “softie”. Any way we could have a chat on email or something to see whether our experiences are alike with our twins at the opposite ends of the spectrum? might give eachother more insight into how our twins were feeling at that given time? X
Such truth in what you wrote. Thank you for the affirmation. Sadly, I feel we are nowhere near that place as we still hold on to our ‘normal’ lives in fear perhaps. Fear that has been conditioned by society, family and religion. Although our souls are both yearn to reach out to each other we are not able to let go of our responsibilities.
I can feel him. And I am not sure sometimes if the surge of emotions I feel are mine or his. I am still trying to put into words what we are and how it feels but I am unable to do so in a coherent manner such as you have been writing. so thank you again, clark.
My friend I am sorry for what that feels and I can only read it here, but I felt your sadness in it. I can say that the strength of wanting to be together sometimes finds ways that are unforeseen and don’t lose sight of that. The stronger the feeling becomes to you the more you have to see the beautifulness that it gives you to experience. Sometimes we tend to lean on the side of right or wrong, yet what feels absolutely right evades because of the process that our minds create that spawns the energy to keep it from you. Change that.. Be in those moments that take your breath away. It has an energy to change everything when you stay in it. Do you understand?
Yes I do.
We have been able to experience those moments briefly and they are all amazingly beautiful beyond words.
We have never been either a runner or chaser. It has always felt right somehow to allow things to just happen. So… we shall see where our paths take us.
I am sending you energy to make it so my friend… 🙂 Do you have any questions if so.. Ask away.. We are here! 😉
I am so grateful I stumbled upon your blog, today. I just first want to say thank you. 6 years ago I met my twin. It has been both the most painful experience but yet the most beautiful one. When we met he was already in a committed relationship, (unknowing to me, cause I live in a different country), but from the first time I laid eyes on him, my heart and soul felt so alive. I met him in person 2 years after we met online, and all I can say is, time would past by so fast each and every time. We would talk and laugh for hours. But I went back home, and things changed, he wants to do the right thing and tries to convince me everything is ok, but I know it is not. I can feel when he is struggling, I can feel when he is tired and just ready to say screw it. That is when he seems to pop back in. And because I love him dearly, I allow it.
He has truly helped me resolve a lot of issues I buried deep inside, and I am so grateful for him. I love him like no other, but after 6 years I can’t keep putting myself through this pain.
Yes, it is painful knowing that he is with someone else, and I only get pieces. After a night of chatting with him, I did not like how I felt. I chanted on it and felt ok, then the next night I had the worst dream ever. A first for me. I woke up crying and felt so hurt behind this dream. All the other dreams I have ever had we were always having so much fun and just carefree, but this time, he was being mean and saying hateful things, like he could never love me, and that he was only playing with me. So, I wrote him a letter, my emotions were so all over the place. I knew he had read it, cause I felt the pain in my heart, but he waited to respond, and as always, it is my insecurities, blah, blah blah. So, I told him that he would never understand that in all my life I have never been able to open up to anyone, it is like he reels me in, gets me to open up, we have intimate conversations, joke etc, then I won’t hear from him for days. It just seemed so unfair. I also told him that I never meant to cause this much pain for him, but I just couldn’t do it anymore.
We do this like 1 a year, but this time I am very serious. I am a lot stronger than I was in the beginning. I really don’t know what to do, I never gave him an ultimatum, because I don’t want to be the reason, I want him to be his reason. I know he has always done things to please others, I feel that. I was like that before, but had 2 years of seeking my own spirituality to know that I had to be and stay true to myself.
I can’t talk to anyone about this, because they don’t understand, and think that I am just MAD, behind this man, six years is far to long to be Mad behind someone…LOL Everyday the love gets stronger and stronger, but when we have our bits, its very painful. It’s almost like a lost phase, your here but your not, and lord knows I try and meditate so that does help.
I truly need insight on how to move forward and leave it behind. Thanks
A twin gives you something in the mirror of how you heal in all things.. Some connections are so powerful we never make out this part of the connection.. we miss something… something that will give us what this connection should…. You inside of yourself!
One of the most existent changing of what you exist to find is the place deeply rooted in being. It is that when you go into this journey one of the biggest changers is the need or want to always see in opposites yet inside you there are none. A twin gives you this mirror. What happiness is, is a gigantic orb attached to you called the soul. This radiant light force is strong enough to endure the harder times one may experience in the search to connect the dots of the outer world. This happiness is filled with love that has no opposite. It doesn’t want for anything, want for anyone, just you, the being that animates because it is completely connected to you. Your twin lives in there with you. this will never abandon you, this will never leave you. The you, I am referring to is the one that has thoughts about whether there is a good, and a bad, a like or dis-like, a love, and hate. And even believes that the other understands the formula created in you to give you a thought process where in fact this place of connection has no thought process. This being in you loves you completely unconditional. Hence the pull to this twin that is you. It makes everything in your experience in this existence function without your ability to think for it doesn’t require thought, you do!
Thinking happens to you.. still does, in many ways, and different ways. Yet it won’t point you to this fact until your twin comes into your existence.
If your with someone who doesn’t allow you to see this and find this in yourself without being told, then let me assure you this is where the twin points…
Many mistake a connection of familiar with a twin.. but a twin will mirror your own deceptions of what you give to yourself to include the journey of what is inside you!
Again a twin will be defiant, some will even run, some will evade, yet the mirror of your twin will make them see themselves fully just as it does you. Some take a long time to realize they can’t run from it, yet the time is the illusion of itself. It becomes non existent in the journey inside of you. What if twins both run from what they see in the mirror. This is common and self destructive to a pain that truly will birth them stronger when or if surrender happens.
Understand pain is pain but the reflective pain you experience from this we all run from a twin gives you this effect, you will hurt each other sure.. but what great love hasn’t experienced great pain to birth in that love. It is not someone stating something about the other all of what you see in yourself your twin will allow you to see amplified. It is what you didn’t see about yourself that you are now willing to change inside of you. Do you see how powerful that is????
It keeps you company as it goes on auto pilot allowing what you view of the outside world to occur while it will steadily keeps your heart pumping, your lungs filling with air, allowing you the motion, and ability to pick this up, or sit this down. It even calls to you when all of that is needing to rest, much like a dinner bell ringing for dinner time. It will always be able to get your attention and vibrate you when it needs to let you know all things. This pathway is how the telepathy is birthed in you and your twin. How do you get to the place inside you that the outside world no longer matters or what you experienced without turning off all the noise that isn’t inside of the connection?
How we evolve into the world of form, this soul doesn’t make a judgement, or a conclusion because it is connected to all things in all forms and formless. This awakening in you is the most profound and most unbelievable experience, for it will give you something that you seek outside you to find. Connection….. If you never fully connect to this inside you, how do you connect to what is outside you? A twin will share in this with you… maybe not at the same time for one of you needs to find this path to speak to the other and help them find this path clearly.
After all you are not in the passenger seat of this.. you are definitely driving this experience. Do you see how this one simple thread of love that is beyond words should be every beings starting point in what they should learn?
We are limited in capacity to know how deeply we can connect to others outside of us because we miss this most magnificent journey inside ourselves. A twin flame is this connection….. One step, One moment at a time you are inside looking out for what?
There is no why to how this happens, there is only when this happens. The healing, and the acceptance of what this could mean to your connection in all things, this miraculously beautiful existence reveals itself to you to see with your ears, taste with your nose, feel with your eyes, etc… you get the point?
How do you know the outside world is doing the same? You experience it for yourself. You invite yourself to know how deeply it is to love and what that love feels like upon giving it to the unexplored places within you that still await! How does something so connecting inside yourself experience a twin flame relationship without this very profound journey?
The waiting of 6 years my friend.. Is because this effect is being run away from either one of you. I can point to this, I can even guide you to it. I promise you when you do just this simple stripping away from all that is outside you and look inside you it changes everything outside you without you even noticing. If you want to feel a love like no other wouldn’t this be the path you should take? If not now, when?
Thanks for your warm and loving and inspiring words. I guess you can say in a lot of ways we both are runners. He hides his truth from himself and his loved ones. Myself, I get scared of the connection, because I don’t want to be the reason. When I first moved back home the pain was quite intense, and the more I chanted the more I missed him, and he would come around, that would scare me and I would stop. Then I suffered deeply. Within the last 6 months I started to really pray for clarity, what i wanted in my life. With ever conversation and breaks we would take, it became clear to me, that if I am happy he is happy. If I am sad he is sad.
It also came to me that, I know I want him in the physical. And after this realization is when I started to feel indifferent about the intimacy that we share. I realized I was deceiving myself, and I no longer wanted that. It is all or nothing for me in the physical sense, which it should have been in the beginning. I got truly hurt when I had that dream because it seemed so real, even pointed to past conversations. It messed me up. I felt so vulnerable, to bare your entire being to someone and yet I had nothing. In the physical sense it did seem like I was being made a fool, but knowing him he would never. He has indeed helped me heal the pain of my past, it has not been easy, but with ever layer I do shed, I see the beautiful being I am suppose to be. I often wonder though is he learning anything? But I know that does not matter, because I truly know he is.
You said something in your post that I would like more understanding, if you don’t mind.
“Is because this effect is being run away from either one of you. I can point to this, I can even guide you to it. I promise you when you do just this simple stripping away from all that is outside you and look inside you it changes everything outside you without you even noticing.”
Thank you so much Clark,
Your words and spirit has been such a saving grace.
I am pointing to you inside yourself in this moment and all moments coming. this is where you are with the past pains, without the past experiences of the mind that point to in the future. You see how this very thing keeps you separated from you and who you truly are with or without form? You are no more a past painful experience than you are a future driven to pain to come. This identity keeps the connection for being. When a child comes into the world does it experience the past or future. It experiencing everything more fully. I know you can probably tell me a story about you that was.. Why do you place a weight in time to hold onto pain that keeps you from seeing what any pain births? The radiant beautiful being you are doesn’t need this. What makes you, you is the art of acceptance that you are all this combined inside of that beauty! Do you see that for yourself because of your twin or do you go in your thoughts and keep this from ever being shown to you?
I have come to see this because of my twin. I suppressed a lot of things, it was only when I went through my divorce did I decide to look within. The ugliness from the antics of the divorce and the psychological abuse made me to start my spiritual path. I knew I did not want to end up in another relationship like that, but it seemed to me that every man I came into contact with was so much like my ex husband. After 3 years into the divorce process, is when I asked the universe to show me that all men where not like him, cause I was the polar opposite of my ex. He was a liar, a cheater, and very manipulative, and I was nothing like this.
I made a list of qualities and characters I wanted in a man, and only prayed once about it, but I did ask for my life mate for world peace. That is when I met my Twin. It was very mystic, because I was not truly looking, and it was over the internet, and we lived in different countries. I had just joined this business networking sight for a business I joined, (lol) and the next morning, I logged in and I had a friend request, at first glance, I knew I knew him. I am not and have never been the type to approach a man, and it took me 5 times of logging in to say anything, and I was so embarrassed after the fact, but I know what it is about him that I fell so strong and so deep for. In all honesty he is not my type as far the physical aspect of him. But the connection was beyond anything I felt, almost instant.
But enough of me rambling on, over the past 6 years I have experienced the greatest joy as well as the most pain. I knew I was a good person, and had a good heart, but I never trusted anyone. I always believed people always had an ulterior motive for the things they did. Through our connection, it has forced me to confront my issues, embrace the pain and see that I am not the ugly person I always thought I was, and through this experience I have learned to open up my heart and love life, sometimes. (lol) I see things in him that make me question myself, because I do believe our environment is a reflection of ourselves. He made me come alive. He made the me, I had lost come out. But I am now a much better version of the old me. And knowing him has made me want to dig deeper. Because he is such a beautiful person I wanted to become a beautiful person as well.
I did not realize I was holding on to past pain, until I met him. It wasn’t until I met him did I start to question some of the things I do, or feel, because I see things within him that I had to see in myself. I know that I never thought I was good enough, or smart enough, I also feared to get close to someone because I knew they would leave, and I knew this stemmed from my childhood, but I refused to believe that this was the reason why I was like this. But through our connection I have come to realize there is much more to me than what I have always believed. I run pretty deep, but I do use my mind way too much. I am now learning to stop that and base everything off prayer. I am a buddhist by the way, so a lot of what you are saying, I do understand, but this soul connection is something that Buddhism does not touch on, other than we are all connected, which I do believe, and therefore I am very mindful of my actions and how I treat people.
However, just recently have I started to see that I need to treat myself better. I have always treated others with the utmost respect, but have always allowed others to denigrate me. I came to the realization that no I am better than that, and I should not allow people to treat me with nothing but love and respect. It is not easy though. I know I have a ways to go, but life itself is a journey. I am finding the courage to truly live in the moment and not go back and not look forward but to enjoy each moment like its my last.
It’s not easy Clark, your post and your spirit tell me you struggled too, when did you come to find and love of you?
After I took my own life my friend… After that I funneled through deep depths of pain as the truth came to set me free. It then became easier in truth to realize how deep my love truly birthed through the pain and how we must save the world by sharing our awakening and what sparked it.. My connection that only mirrored to me my connection to within myself. It was there that I no longer lived in my mind and was able to ask questions of my mind for it to have no answers..knowing answered every moment…. The birth of knowing.. I started with reading Eckhart T. And then I found myself completely immersed in the masters of the Far East all 6 volumes read and repeat.. I was never the same after that.. Words flow without thought.. I write and I just let go… It is more of a reflect of non thought translated from the knowing within me. It finds the unconditional of love digestible and brings acceptance no longer passive in knowing to seek anything to create and keep the ego. It allows our flow of beyond in twins the means to communicate at all the different ways to communicate. We are in a union that allows even the words that we say inside to be heard by the other. We share every thing. Nothing hidden, we see no point within the connection. Illuminating it is and blissful!
I am so happy to hear you have evolved, and so glad that you are in peace with your being. Your a blessing in more ways than you could ever imagine. I do believe that we all have our own unique mission and I pray that I too will reach the level of total bliss that you have shared with me/us. I hope you know you have helped me tremendously. I will continue to reach out when I need it, if you don’t mind. Much love to you and your beautiful twin. xx
Thank you my friend, feel free to email if you find yourself at any crossroads we are here for you! Lois and Clark
About not being able to love each other but needing each other…. Yes I can see your point I too am in a situation, like vampires you energetically feed of others with no love for the other. It’s good that everything is described here as rainbows and flowers but its not. As for needing, better to give the person what they need so they can love the important people in their life and accept that you are and will never be that. You are just a pawn to be used by the needy party. I don’t mean to be cynical, just a realist. You’re not loved. Of course you’re not… If someone truly loves you they would cut their hand or heart out before using you in the name of being needy. Ever hear the story about the 2 women who both claimed to be mothers of a child? The town wise man asked both woman to pull at the child, the one who pulled hardest could claim the child as her own. The true mother tugged snd let go the moment she heard her baby cry. Se could not do it. That is true love. You let go. Even if it kills you. You don’t use a person, you don’t. So if you have peopleyoulove who you don’t want to hurt and you choose to be with them. It is they you love more.
Deep my friend… I wonder if you can see the stream of energy that someone is raised within to determine how they view or respond to what is love or anything else. If they were always in the experience of trying to understand love and saw it as always taking or always giving they may not see what the true purpose is to love and how it can be shared and grown. It really is a deep dark place being in thought to ones self as the teacher of how pain is given, how love is given. As you grow this would mature like anything else. Painfully or full of love. Thank you for the response my friend.
If your twin flame meant his soul mate and his twin flame months apart, and choosing is soul mate instead.
Does that mean his a runner?
Yes it does.. I did the same thing, not because I knew who my twin flame was but in spite of my twin flame, I felt I could be as happy as I could be with my soul mate, this was a failed experience as I could see that I was always thinking of my twin and yet trying to get my soul mate to be more of what I knew I could experience in a shared connection. It was a painful experience, especially when I realized I was going to hurt my soul mate and was currently, and she never deserved any of it.
Thank you! Is there other twin flames that ring each others ears. I had a dream in the afternoon that my twin flame was playing a song to me on his guitar than I woke up and texted him that, he replied back and said that’s strange iam playing my guitar now. Does this mean he thinking about me?
The statement thinking about you is not truly how that works the connection is always connected when love fills the heart of the twin it vibrates the energy you both are allowing clarity of where the feelings as been lite up like a match inside your twin. I see how you would think it is thought.. But thought is only capable of so much, it usually is the rationale that keeps you from understanding the connection completely!
I have been “happily” married almost 17 years to a wonderful man/ soulmate. I met my twin flame at 15 and as we parted at 20 we both married others. I have frequently thought of him over the years. We recently reconnected last fall and it has been he most intense experience of my life. I truly thought I was going crazy with my emotions which were/ are illogical. It has caused a deep spiritual awakening in me and even if we cannot be together I will be forever grateful. My dilemma is how to I continue to live this life with someone who is good to me but not “the one”? I am ready to walk out of this marraige even if it means being alone. My tf said he needs to walk away so our uniting is not an option.
It would seem you can settle with love or break yourself to find the unconditional love you seek.. The awareness of knowing something is deeply connecting to you deep within is that love. My friend here is the place that depth in love points.. Is it love to keep this from the marriage or is the marriage enough to sustain you knowing something more powerful is making its way to you? Even if you are alone you find that you never are this love in energy is self sustaining and the most powerful love to be birthed…
Thank you for your guidance. It is extremely difficult to make this decision. I do not want to hurt my husband as like you said in your comment on may 9… he has done nothing to deserve this. I know my tf feels the same. I dont know the dynamics of his marital relationship other than he is “mostly happy” and has frequently said he doesn’t want anyone hurt. He has told me he cant do this and he needs to walk away. I know there is no guarantee if I leave he will join me so I need to be in peace that I may be alone. Or do I accept that at least I have been shown this love and accept it may not be meant for this lifetime? It seems so selfish to hurt my husband/ children.
Let’s make sure we both are stating selfish properly… Is it selfish to stay with your husband because you have fallen in love with another? Is it selfish to not be at least honest with yourself in this regard? Is it selfish to show to your children that being blissfully happy can be something you give to yourself without making anyone else responsible for it? Is it selfish to live a lie? This awakening in the depth of what this vibration the twin gives you allows you to truly know love and how you aren’t embraced in it within yourself… Even trying to go the opposite is only running from who?
Running from myself? I am scared too. My heart knows the truth… I have found my one twin flame who I will always love above any other. I agree it is unfair to stay with my husband when this is my heart. Will my twin ever be strong enough to come back to me? If I can be strong… will he? It saddens me because i wish I could have this connection with my husband but now that I have experienced it with another I know it simply is not there. Again you may 9 post truly resonates with me. Do I truly have the power to create my happiness and experience. This unconditional
So if you read into what you wrote here.. you are clearly staying that you know it is wrong and that it is that you can’t have another love because you don’t know what your twin will do… May I ask you something do you abandon yourself when you eat something that taste awful and saying I don’t know why I am eating it? Do you hod your breathe and say I can hold it till I pass out because I know it isn’t good for me? Do you see the power of abandonment in your questions to yourself here. I will abandon my beliefs and be ok with believing because it will be for everyone else to include myself cause what I felt wasn’t real. Is that ok with you truthfully? My friend how deep is your love? is it deep enough to make your husband your twin flame or even make the statements that it would be simple. Sometimes these awakenings are pointing to a deeper seeing that has nothing to do with how you treat others outside you but rather what you do inside you. All of these conditions are made to be unconditional by your seeing it for what it is.. The resistance to the present moment and your reality within it. How much love could you possess if you followed that love to lead you to yourself? You sure your following choices are the right path?
Continued… love that I desire so fiercely? I know I need to have faith and I do but this is the biggest crossroads of my life so I keep looking for signs/ affirmations of the right path to take.
Here is a sign… Conditions to unconditional.. once you make this the only choice you will create mind dominance to tell you right from wrong not seeing the freedom to give up and become unconditional love inside you to emit outside you. If you can abandon yourself why would your twin stay with you.. This is always the runner chaser syndrome in full effect. Yet you can’t see it because you make it about what is outside you and never see the place you emit the drive to bring all things of love to you. How do you give something you won’t give yourself? You don’t you either extract the place of love inside you and allow it to blossom or you run from it, the longer you take the more mirrors you project to your twin.. How can a twin see inside themselves when you don’t see inside of yourself? How do they run when you are running from a thought process of abandoning what you feel outside you to be inside you to just be as you would be if nothing stopped you. The mirror is that effect my dear friend.. Look in one to see if you recognize the patterns that you have had your entire moment to see that moment to change it! You can only change it in this moment. Anything more is your heartbeat beating so many times before it doesn’t. You sure that time is all you have in making a choice that is opening doors inside you to allow the love you are.. not the love you think..
I do love my twin flame very deeply. This whole experience is overwhelming and I am trying to make sense of it… when I think I do it seems I don’t. Thank you for trying to give me the persepective I need. I obviously have more learning/ growing to do. I am trying…. I thank you for your time and responses.
My friend I am only point to the truth in questions you should be asking yourself… This is about your step in the 1000 steps to your destination… Without these questions you will never see the path laid before you… I know these seem difficult but name one tree that has stopped being beautiful because of the storms endured it is rare that they become unroofed but does it still give air for us to breathe?
We will be here for you, don’t stop challenging, and don’t stop asking the deeper questions! its not about growing or learning it is about your knowing, knowing you are awake and no longer asleep at the wheel… 😉
Try is a word that signifies I don’t have to make a decision now I will suffer in this as a matter of choice… Why suffer did you suffer in the depths of connection… What is suffering to you and why allow the mind the right to say its what you are? You do have choice my friend you are not alone… We are here!
hey… can twins b together for the whole life time? ?
They are always connected, even if not in the physical.
but can they marry each other?
They most certainly do in a way that is divine continuously. It goes beyond ones imagination to know this union is cemented long before the physical.
Bt officially. .. can they?
Yes but not without swimming through a hurricane of existence… The calmness of the eye in the storm is ones idea of bliss where it is a wealth of answers yet swimming back through to the shore is where the true wedding occurs.. This marriage on the shore goes beyond the answers of the mind and places you on beach of the source embedded in soul and the body it unites the union in truth… Do you understand?
its bit typical!
u mean after passing through lots of difficulties?
The truth is that this question requires a post and I am going to do so now… I feel I will need to be direct in the answer yet I want to ensure I leave no stone unturned. 🙂
oh and does astrology has anything to do with twin flame?
Yes it does… In a different understanding all energy can be looked at through the lens of astrology and the signs..
can u explain Hw astrology is connected with twin flame relation?
http://wp.me/p2ML45-17a here is your answer! thank you! Clark
It is all a mystery. As written above, I separated from my twin flame. I have been ‘superwoman’ in terms of trying my best in putting love into this situation, only God can know what I have done, gone where angels fear to tread. I have no answers to anything. Given a taste of paradise, only for it to disappear like dust. I can’t understand why this has been dangled in front of me for it to cruelly disappear? Scared that this has been an opportunity given to us by God, for us both to work on our issues together, I know these chances are a gift from heaven, but we could not do it…I did my very best. And I silently do more…
Now separated since March 2013. Spent a long time trying to understand what has been happening, trying to heal myself, trying to heal all the pain, trying to give myself a better life. I have no answers. I don’t know anything. I don’t know the answer of how I can be as a person in order to attract and sustain such a thing as receiving love from another human being. Sustained, nurturing, life-giving, life-building. The presence of love from another when the chips are down, when the chips are up. I have no answers on how I can be.
What if for the rest of my life I never see him again? This could be my life. I did my very best, I could not do anymore. Sometimes I do not know what God wants me to
I have been very ill since my separation and moving to a new city. My body shut down so now I am looking after it better.
I am more at peace with myself, just plodding on with my life now. I am aiming to get my strength back as a strong woman, that I always have been.
Life has given me a blank slate, for I have no job yet. I was wondering about my local area and went into a cafe. I heard a mans voice with the same accent as my love, and ended up telling him about my beloved. I thought I had been fine, but I ended up very tearful. He was the manager of the cafe and sat down with me, to share a lunch together. He handed me a tissue and said do you want to cry everyday? No? Then it is time to move on. Move on and have fun. Have a ball. Go and have sex. There are a hundred men in a queue waiting to be with you. Body shut down? Go and have a massage. Massage every week. He was a very funny man who made me laugh too. He then personally sent me to the town centre and paid for a Chinese woman to give me a long massage. I could not believe what was happening…ha!
But what has helped me the most is this. I got this from a person at a singing group that I joined. Just put your hand on your heart. I can feel something loving me. I place my hand again. It is still loving me. I can actually feel something loving me.
Yes it always seems to be that what we miss in giving to ourselves is this same reminder you placed here. That was simply a beautifully tragic evolution. I felt it to the core. Thank you so much for this! 😉
ok.. Bt if me n my partner’s bday n etc are not according to astrology. .. still he can b my twin?
I emailed you… for there is more to this then what can be gone over in this message.
Can you email that to me as well? Thanks!
what would you like me to email you my friend… send me a message… Superman1017316@yahoo.com
This is going to be long so please bare with me. A year ago I started writing a novel and the male protagonist suddenly popped up in my head. He was so vivid, almost like I’ve met him in person. I even molded this novel around me meeting him so much so that it actually happened how I wrote in my novel.
Anyways, when I was looking for pictures in the Internet to find someone who looked sort of like the character. When I found the pictures of this guy it was the craziest feeling in the world. Cause as soon as I saw his eyes, I saw in to him if that makes any sense. I’m not afraid to leap, take chances as a person. So I sought him out on a social networking site.
I began asking questions I already knew the answers too, mind you I’ve never in my life contacted anyone in any social network, I don’t even warm up to people face to face let alone on the Internet. Not right away, everyone is suspect to me. I have trust issues when it comes to making friends. I make connections with certain people, not worth all. Yet with him it was so easy. it was like I new him, like we’ve always been friends, he too was as easy going, very playful and joketive. I had no problem opening up to him feelings wise. We are both very creative, very in to knowledge, learning and expanding as people. But Subconsciously or as told by many, I didn’t want to be so vulnerable, but I couldn’t stop myself, not with him, it’s like i wanted to be transparent in every way, i didnt want to hide, not from him, i didn’t want to put on a false mask, i wanted to be open, and let him see all of me, the negative and positives, not the superficial( i say superficial cause the me I show many, is the me that is guarded)
When he witnessed this he started to become distant, cause I wanted him to do the same but couldnt understand why he wouldn’t be as open and as transparent as I was . One thinks honesty is the key since everyone complains people are honest enough, and for the first time that i was honest it was back firing . So the more I pushed the more he retreated. He even told me one time, “Please stop the feelings are just too unbearable. please give me space so I can think.” And that hit me hard, “Space.” To me, means rejection, so I myself was retreating, when he saw that i stopped communicating, he dedicated a song to me basically telling me to wait for him, that he was close behind.
However, every time I reached out asking him to express his feelings to let me in after that, It’s like he disappeared off the face of this earth. So I wrote a letter telling him what was going on, why I was being so persistent. I told him that I’ve been behaving unlike myself, doing and saying things I would never say to someone else. That i’ve never felt for anyone the way I feel for him, not even with the father of kids whom I was with since the age 19 and I even told him that. I’m the kind of person that nothing bothers them(bad experience as a teenager made me hard and guarded as a person ) if I break up with someone I get over it with in days. When i broke up with the father of my kids i got over it with in a weeks. But for some insane reason I couldn’t and can’t do it with him. And I wrote this to him. I even told him that he was breaking me, but I was telling him because I didn’t know who else to tell what was going on. If my told my family the would look at me like I’m crazy since I’m very rational and analytical as a person, but acting on emotions is something I wasn’t doing until I met this guy.
Funny thing is, I can tell when he’s hurt, when he’s happy, there are times when I’m laughing and happy and all of a sudden I begin to cry for no apparent reason. For months I was so hurt, so mad, I even lashed out and pointed every single flaw he had, told him that he needed to let go, that he needed to heal, and more stuff. I even began asking god, how can two people be so happy, so in tune with each other for a week ( I know , it’s not long enough.) as if they knew each other for years and then all of a sudden that happiness is taken away. I told this guy, if he believed in Soul mates ( I really didn’t know about twin flames until a week ago.) when i said that, he blocked me . In turn i deleted my profile online out of spite and ( and cause for some odd reason I knew it would hurt, in turn it hurt me as well) because i had a feeling he was keeping tabs on me. When i did he was in active the same amount of time i had deleted my profile, 15 days. I created a new one, and requested to be his friend, he accepted it.
But I still didn’t understand it, I’m not clinging, yet I was with him, I don’t obsess over anything yet I was, or should I say still am, but now I’m more giving in to growth.
Before him I was already going through the stage which I like to call “finding myself.” I’m more interested in the spiritual now, growing inwardly. An one day before he reached out to me, I was crying and saying “I want to find me again. There’s something missing, I know there is. Where is the me that I was , when I was child. The me before I met the father of my kids, where am I.” I was depressed for days , And out of the blue the new guy reached out to me.
This is a lot, but I’m trying to understand Whats happening here. Three days ago I was really sad, and the song Georgia on my mind by Billie holiday popped up in my mind, and it uplifted me, for three days now I’ve been listening to it and smiling. Then I went online, and three days ago he posted a picture it said “Welcome to Georgia we are happy we are on your mind.”
A couple of weeks ago I began looking online for explanations as to why I feel like I can feel him. Why at times I can see him, or see him laugh, even cry. I’ve even seen him look at my picture( in my minds eyes usually when I’m sleeping but not really sleeping cause ever since talking to him I’ve become really restless. My mind feels like it’s on over drive all the time.) and he asked himself “What are you doing to me.” I ask myself the same questions. I even asked him four days ago if he was drinking, because I felt really woozy, and out of it, and he posted a picture on line of a whole bunch of shot glasses.
It wasn’t until a week ago that I finally said to myself “All happens for a reason. I asked for growth, and he is showing me a lot of things with in myself, I wrote everything I’ve noticed in the last couple of months about me.” And I started crying like never before, but it was the type of crying were you just pause for a very long time and it seems like nothing, not a sound will escape you. Once I did that I felt so relieved, and a sense of peace. It felt good to just to be honest with myself, and to want to change for the better in every sense of the word. To be
self again, that’s what I really need. I’m coming to terms with everything, I’m allowing myself to dig deep with in me and focus on me. I’m a control freak when things don’t go my way, and I’ve noticed that this is something out of my control. This plan it’s something is to far for me to grasp and say I’ll control it. I don’t fear this change in me, I’m not fearing who I’m finding, or even the ugly in me. I’m uncovering so much that for many years I suppressed because I’ve never allowed myself to show feelings I always saw feelings as a weakness and it’s because my kindness was always taken for granted or people used me or walked all over me that I started to put walls up. I stopped crying for a very long time.
So although I am very vocal, very positive and intuitive and loving , I also limit all of this for fear of others taking advantage of me or using it against me. There are a lot of things to be honest. And all that I’m having issues with, I can feel he does too. He’s very passive, and with him I was overly passive, he’s very distant, I started to distance myself for fear of hurting. Emotionally he controls himself, I am the same way. He has trust issues, I do too although with him I didn’t. It’s the weirdest feeling every, I remember telling him “You’ve awaken something in me that has been lost for so long and I don’t how you did it, but you did.” He responded with “Im afraid of that, afraid that I’m always on your mind.”
I don’t know if this is me, but when I was upset with him and being so judgmental, I could not dream at all. I wasn’t dreaming. Then I started to do the seeing with in me, letting go, opening myself and now I can feel him again. He taught me a lot , a lot of patience.
I’ve been trying to show him the side he’s not allowing himself to see. But I know now that hinders him cause the more I push, the more he pulls away, I’ve the chaser from the beginning, cause I didn’t want to loose him. After a crying spell I had last night, I went to sleep, and I saw him. We were sitting down in his apartment in New York( which he knows that I’m going in June since I told him when we first started talking cause we were talking about meeting face to face.) talking about all thats happened the last four months, and I began to cry, in my dream. And I told him “I don’t understand why I’m crying so much. I don’t get it.” And it was a cross between crying, laughing and feeling a sense of peace all at the same time.
And he told me “I know why, is because you love me, and I you.” He went on to tell me , “That he’s ready now , ready to heal, ready to see inside himself and reconnect.” And I was happy, then he told me, ” Please don’t leave, wait for me, I’m close behind. I just need time, time to heal, to figure this out. But I promise to be with you once I’m done. Just wait.” And he was crying. Don’t if this is appropriate but, in this mental state where I’m sleeping we are always intimate, and we cry. Don’t know why, but we do.
When I woke up my pillow was completely wet, I was crying in my sleep. It’s so much that’s happening, before I felt like I was stagnate, just sitting while everything was happening around, just there, but not really in my body if that make sense. It like I was looking at myself wondering why the hell was I so lost, and where was I.
I know now that I can’t focus on his growth, if I worry to much about him I will loose my purpose of growing myself. He will also loose purpose. We both need to do this not for each other, but because it’s for self.
My issues stem from my childhood. His from his past relationships, and some from his childhood as well. He hasn’t told me, but I feel it is, he’s the middle child and to felt over shadowed by his older brother and younger sister, he feels like he’s never good enough no matter how much he has, he has too prove himself, but it never is enough, again he’s never told me this but I feel it, funny cause I feel like that at times, like I live by others expectations.
I’m learning that if I worry too much about pleasing others in my life, I will be holding myself back. Cause I won’t be living for me( i also have people pleaser issues.) its like I contradict myself a lot, i want to be who I really am inside, but yet my fear is what keeps me from being the better me that i know resides deep down inside me, but all this, what I’m admitting to now, o couldn’t do four months ago, in fact I out the blame on others, but with him, in those four little months I’ve learned more about myself, then ever before.
I want him to be happy, even if it’s not with him. That’s all I want, to be honest. I’m letting to, cause he needs to walk this path alone, I can’t hold his hand , it will do neither of us any good. When it’s our tome to be together it will happen. Because I finally realized that forcing it, wanting it is selfish, and it will hurt because it’ll be for all the wrong reasons. I won’t be learning the life lesson in suppose to be learning, instead I will fall back in to old habits and that will defeat the purpose of growth.
We have a big age difference, he’s 23 going on 24, I just turned 28, however, we both are very mature, I’ll say old souls, my mother always told me I was an old soul. Yet our difference is, I’m way more playful, and naive, he gives himself no room for mistakes. I’ve even told him that and he was really hurt by it.
I believe in the mirror affect. We both disappear , then reappear both of us looking for the other indirectly. All I know is that I’ve never ever felt this way before, not even with the father of my children. I told my mother that I care for the father of my children. But after meeting the new guy, I know now I was never in love with the father of my children. I played a lot of mind games with him, I never was open about my feelings with him. And the longer we were together , we were more like room mates , and it just got to the point where I knew I was content, the content held me back from growing, and I started out growing the father of my children I believe he was holding me back a lot. But I could be wrong, maybe he too was teaching something, maybe the fact that I can be complacent at times.
I sometimes think I’m going crazy. I wrote everything down, because to me it’s important to write about it. Overall, I feel like “Finally, I’m seeing me again.” I don’t know if any of this makes sense. But spiritually, internally, externally, everything , I just feel different, a new, reborn, on the road to rebirth. Does that make any sense?
I did do something, I will call it manipitive because it is. That’s another thing I’ve learned about myself, how I manipulate situations so it can go my way. This happened a week ago before I really started to further understand things, and stopped being mad but grateful for this change since many don’t experience it and are in limbo. I wrote him a letter, telling I still wanted to be with him and meet him. However, I explained that I wasn’t going to push anymore. That whatever he was going through he would have to face, but it was up to him. I told him I wasn’t going to continue being the on initiate, pointing out his flaws. These are things my pushing wasn’t going to make him see, cause honesty hurts and when it hurts you turn a blond eye to it, or out of spite deny it. I plate two links on the litter of twin flames, and told him that what he was going to read was the things I was feeling. I told him to keep an open mind because I know he’s very drawn to the spiritual, and unexplainable.
For a while I felt apprehensive about something, I didn’t know what but I did. Over the weekend, I was feeling pulled, I wanted to do something but I didn’t know what. I was watching a movie, I was very easy going happy, and I busted out crying, and that’s when I knew he read the letter, this week is now that I’m feeling light, I don’t feel weight on my shoulders. At first I felt like I was carrying both our weight, but I don’t feel that anymore. Does this make any sense? I’m not worried, or scared, I love this feeling of reconnecting, I don’t know how to explain it really, but it’s like the light is finally coming through, when I felt like I was in endless darkness. I feel at times like I’m having an outer body experience, and I’m smiling at myself. I don’t know if anyone is feeling or has felt this, I’m still in the road of walking this path. All I know is that the fear of seeing me, letting go, is slowly diminishing. And I’m happy about that, I don’t feel trapped, that’s the word I’ve been looking for, I feel that I’m setting my self free. I’m pretty sure as I continue delving deeper I’ll have my moments, but I’m keeping my mind, my spirit as open as possible to allow the transition to continue it’s course.
This I my story so far. It’s a bit too much to read, the times might be off since so much has happened so fast. But in just thankful and grateful it’s happening.
As I’m writing now, I can see that everything I wrote to him in letters is the same inner problems that I was having an it is how I know his fears. It’s the craziest thing ever. It’s such an unexplainable thing, it’s really hard to say is this way, and that way. Cause everyone has a different out look , or purpose or amount of growth. And it might be too soon for me to uncover so much. But this is something I’ve wanted since to 2012. I just was in denial, I was afraid of facing myself, until he came in to my life. He opened this door, where I could see a better, side of me, the potential I had if only I shed all the of skin, all the expectations, fears, everything that is hindering to me and I both love him and thank him so much for it. I’ve told him this. I’ve told him about the push-pull feeling, awakening, all the things that I’ve been feeling. I write a lot it’s how I reflect, I’ve always been a writer.
Sorry for the long post. I just wanted to tell my story, what in experiencing now and just hoping for feedback. On why I really have no idea. But I did want to share my story.
Does anyone else have vivid dreams where they are talking to their twin flame and talking to get a better understanding of what I happening. Cause I do, I’ve even seen a lodge over looking the mountains, we both like quit places, but also like the outdoors, I love lakes. Well I see us talking there and in his apartment in New York. We support each other when the other is sad, or confused, we encourage each other. Does anyone experience this?
All this is new to me. Never even believed in this until it happened. I was in a relationship for six year before I started talking to him, with the father of my kids and I always felt like I was taking steps backwards instead of forward, I was stagnate. But with this new guy, it was like a light went on an “Aha” moment if that makes sense.
Absolutely perfect… It not only is identical to Lois and I.. it mirrors the effect of the magnets of twins.. the push pull polarity you are experiencing.. Realize that when you let go you give and create space for your twin to heal.. Some are so in the pull or the push they see no result until you let go… Then your own healing begins the miraculous of your truth shines.. the places in you grow a new place of love that you always knew without knowing.. I was going to make this a separate post but it spoke greatly of the shift that happens inside yourself that needs your focus when you are seeking this connection. My friend.. there is much that will connect you that you do as you heal these things inside of you… Feel free to email us.. We will be more than able to listen and help you understand what you are seeing as you see it.. but you have perfectly stated this.. btw.. I was a middle child completely dominated in mind dominance of logic that I was constantly the runner and she was the chaser.. This blog was created to help sever the change that comes to you and how your view can change.. not by holding on.. but by letting go! Absolutely beautiful my friend!
Thank you so much for your response and for taking the time to better explain it to me. I still feel the push and pull. However, after the dream I had last night, I believe I explained it in the bottom. I know that my focus is for self. I was questioning before the fact that if my other self, or should my mirror was going to be alright, or if he is….but to much of the questioning is focusing all the energy in his physical form. I believe that is counter productive for me.
I started doing some reading, about awakening, and also writing, but I free write, which allows everything to flow with out the ability to edit my thoughts. Free writing for me comes out, as I am feeling what I am putting down on paper, if that makes any sense. I also find myself writing to me, don’t know if that makes sense either. But after I did this today, I began to focus the energy on me. Because what I rationalize and was holding on to was the two physical forms, mine and my twins. Yet, focusing the energy on me, is focusing it on him. Cause we are one, so there really is not need to obsess on him, when we are both from the same energy, I hope that sounds right. I’m not thinking of us as split, not anymore. This is allowing me to walk my path, look with in me, accept the negative and the positives, and not question the reasons why things happen how they did in my pass or why. I’m on the road of accepting and forgiving, and forgiving myself as well.
I was talking to my mother, and told her about my awakening, what I’m going through. And I asked her the question that I had asked myself this afternoon. I asked her if she loved herself, and she told me it is now that she is beginning to love herself. She went on to tell me that she also has forgiven all the wrong that others had done to her, but she hasn’t for given the things she has done, especially with me and my sisters. I asked her why not? She told me because she thinks about what if’s, maybe if she wouldn’t have done the things she had done , maybe we would have grown up different. I asked her did she honestly believe that. I asked her what if it was meant to be that way? What if through your mistakes, yours doing, we learned something valuable? What if that was meant to be so we could learn a valuable lesson. Not only for you,( because she knows what it is to hit rock bottom) but for us. And she didn’t have an answer. She did say she feels guilt, and I also asked, if a higher power came down to her from the heavens and told her that you were meant to experience that, that , that was your purpose to teach us strength to overcome, would she feel guilty then? She answered no, she wouldn’t. I asked why, she answered “Because there is no need to question the divine. I don’t question gods purpose, cause he will never put on to me what can’t handle.”
It was weird, because it goes back to wanting to know, rather then stepping in the unknown and letting yourself guide you. I did tell her that I have forgiven her, a long time ago. I don’t hold her responsible for anything. Because, a negative response in life, doesn’t continue bringing on pain, unless you allow it to take you over. With my mother I gave in to that pain, I forgave her for it, and see the positive in it. My mother despite all that she has gone through is a very loving, person, her love is selfless. She doesn’t do expecting in return, she does because it comes from her, it resides in her. It’s not told that she should to it, she just does, like primary reflexes, instead of secondary.
I’m happy I was able to talk to her about this and she didn’t freak out. She listened, she always has in the past. But this time she truly listened and I believe it’s because she can relate cause she has struggled a lot spiritually and with in herself.
I know I write a lot. But talking to her showed me, that my focus should be with in me. Only then can I really see me, accept me all the negatives, all the positive, all of my past , all of my present, everything as a whole, with out judgment, or guilt, or hate, not as a victim, or pointing fingers at others for my short comings, not even with fear. But with love, and see the beauty in me.
It brings me to something I wrote to myself. A child loves unconditionally, with out judgment, with out fear, it sees the beauty in the most unattractive thing, it’s all innocent. A child, infant I should say, even toddler, knows no hate, nor pain, it only knows love, a child lives in the moment, its surroundings is beauty, a child see everything in awe, everyday seeing the same thing , yet it always feel’s new to them, nothing seems insignificant. And even when others reject them, it still gives that same love, because that’s all it knows that’s how they see the world. They don’t see the ugly in anything, the ugly is the beautiful, the beautiful is the beautiful, it hasn’t been tarnished. That is what I wish to find, that peace, that living in the moment, that radiation of love, the innocence and how it flows continuously, that is the love with in me that my self that I’m beginning to understand. Does that make sense?
It makes sense… The child is the eyes that are seen into you as you are seen inside as the child.. From all angles all directions in and out.. Metamorphosis is coming.. Listen to the thoughts without judgement without action… True consciousness emerges from this form within the twins.. One can go ahead as the patience for the other needs consumption… Peace you will find deep serene peace…
I have another question;
Has anyone experienced long spells of restlessness before and after their twin flames appeared in their life. Cause for the life of me I can’t sleep. I’ll sleep, have a dream and wake up crying. Or I’ll just tossed and turn and just look up at the ceiling. When I do this I feel him doing the same.
I also feel him trying to find someone else to forget about me, but finds himself comparing every person he meets to me. He’s a home body, an now he’s been going out to bars every weekend.
The feeling everything part freaks me out a lot at times. But when I dream, we always assure they other everything is going to be fine. That we will soon meet.
Yet I don’t know if I’m just imagining all this, or it’s really us communicating. Do I believe with out a doubt, yes, does it freak me out yes, why? Cause if I see him face to face it’s stepping in to the unknown, I’d be lying if I said I’m not scared of that. I think that what has me taking gradual steps is the fact that we haven’t been face to face with each other, or should I say in close proximity cause I’ve seen him on video chat. But the proximity part, that’s a whole other thing, that will deepen everything, that is what I fear, what can come with it.
I have a month to figure that one out. I know I’ll bump in to him in New York, I’m telling myself to avoid the down town area, but my inner self is telling me not to. This is the part that I’m battling with a of now. This is a fear in trying to let go of , along with everything else. Cause the deepening of the bond , connection is just stepping in to the unknown, I leaped once, I’ve done it a lot with him.
I don’t know I’m conflicted.
You are doing the same result of the mind dominance that keeps you apart.. This connection is in a place of no mind.. the push pull experience is the connection not your thoughts about it. You create a gap in the stream of the mind when you accept this and stop seeking the connection in your thoughts about it, but in the connection itself. You see what you make into the enemy is the mind.. His mind, your mind, these content managers always have a place of resistance in this connection. He was brought up his 24 years in a thought process without you.. doesn’t mean he is not connected to you, it is that the experience in connection wants to cement which means the mind has to give up it’s identity. How do you give up an identity if you think to yourself who will I be without this. You will be found out.. you will be cornered, your sense of self will be diminished and all the reasons you have made purposeful will now become useless cause the lie inside you that your mind makes it is found out. It is no more a truth that what you have experienced sums up who you are and why you are. This connection pushes past this.. It does this on purpose. It is not that you are restless it is that your mind is still going or his mind is still going and seeking and finding present moments that will make you forget it are becoming more and more of a goal.. that is why he chases this not because it hurts you, but because he feels his pain being confronted inside himself.. soon he will feel a great love saying how do I give love unto someone when I am constantly in the state of fear and abandonment.. If I expose myself and who I am it will be destroyed.. this chase can go on forever or for a short period of time. This death is not an easy one.. the death of the former self is just as powerful as the human form of death.. It happens abruptly and painfully.. but what a beautiful birth it is when you accept the present moment and your place within it.. and how much more beautiful it becomes in the connection when it happens.. This baggage has to be removed my friend.. not because it has no place but the opposite it has it’s place to see and experience love of the truth. You are not your mind nor is he.. this has not been something you have been taught and to unlearn it takes some twins quite some time. How do you help him through this is how you help this through yourself.. lose judgement of this time and this experience.. It is not going to melt you to him it is actually going to keep the connection more powerful in acceptance.
This is long so bare with me,
I have an important question. I’ve had two major break throughs , don’t know what else to call it. Both made me cry so much, I uncovered a lot of things in such short time periods that keep me of feeling emotions or being vulnerable, which I thought I was already. I always thought I was open emotionally, I even thought I knew who I was, but I dug deep because I’ve been asking myself what has been keeping from feeling everything thats happened in past.
Now i know that rather then face my past as a child I’ve repressed a lot of my feelings so I wouldn’t have to deal with it. Because I didn’t want to hurt my mothers feelings, she is partially one of my reason for fearing my true emotions, another is my father, however, my feeling towards him is stronger cause he planted the seed of abandonment. So did my mother, but I’ve forgiven her, and in turn I’ve allowed healing from it. Is a lot of repression.
Last night however, I allowed myself to dig and dig. When I found all that pain, I was terrified, because I’ve never felt anything like it, because I never allowed myself to feel, I would always say, “Well it happened, move on an get over yourself.” last night that mindset was gone, And it all hit me at once. When I did, I began to think rationally because of fear. I started asking myself what the hell was I doing, I started to doubt. When that happened when I started pulling back in the opposite direction of the feelings, I felt my twin it was odd, I felt heat, heat in the middle of my chest, and my chest felt tingly, almost like a tickle, and it moved to my right arm and then to my back. He starts to chant, I could see him in my minds eyes, and he was chanting , “don’t be afraid, just let go, join me on this path I’m ready to heal. We are meant to walk this path together.”
Can your twin ask you to walk with them? Can they ask for your assistance, or to join them? Cause he continued telling me not to be afraid, to walk with him.
Last night after crying for an hour, and writing , documenting what had happened. I decided to allow myself to drift, just empty my mind and stop thinking and rationalizing and analyzing( which is hard) an just let myself guide myself, does that make sense?
Before I did, I prayed and asked for help, for a sign, cause I honestly admit that I’m confused, and afraid of the unknown. Not being able to see what lies ahead is scary.
When I drifted, I remember seeing a path, but it was coming from with in me, is like I was placing my true path in front of me or it was coming from me, but it was light, I remember the path a light. And as I walked I could see my current path in the physical world, i saw my past, my present, even future, but this wasn’t really what is meant to be as weird as that sounds. It was my path if I continue to fear looking inside myself, the path of denial. It was like I was looking at TV’s each playing back my past. As I continue walking, I start to see my twins past as well, his present and future. Then the similarities began to play out. It was like looking at me, but through two different lens, different backgrounds, yet similar emotional outcomes.
The feeling of seeing everything made me want to run, I was ready to say enough and just block what was happening. I didn’t like seeing what I was seeing, what I was feeling, I wanted it to just stop. It’s odd because I was all ready for it two days ago, even yesterday in the day, but I wasn’t really ready. A lot has to do with the roles switching, now my twin is asking me to walk with him, and to be honest I was not expecting that at all. Just the way I wasn’t expecting him to walk in to my life, this was out of the blue for me.
Not only that, seeing things the way I did brought back fear, of seeing how many times I was let down when ever I became vulnerable or opened up to others only to fall flat on my face. It’s like pieces of me started missing the more I have of myself, and that’s wen I started building walls, started building this thick shell. This allowed me then to be aloof, when others were hurt I wasn’t moved by tears, or their own feelings, no one cared for me why should I care for them, and I saw that, thats always been my thought process, and it was ugly to think that way.
I only really let go with my flame, all the walls crumbled, I let him in with out thinking twice about it, with out regret, I let him see me for me, instead of the mask i put on for others. That was the connection that drew me to him, the ease, I remember us talking and him telling me how much he respected me, he even told me “You are so unique and rare you have so much to give an offer.” That’s before he became a runner, honestly I am running now.
The reason is, when I walked all the way down the path he stood there waiting for me. And I stopped (this is still in my dream) walking. Why I stopped? A couple of days ago he told me to give him time in a dream. Now he’s asking me to walk with him, it made me wonder in my state of drift if this is trickery on my part? Yet something in me tells me no, i know now its not, that it’s my fear that wants to keep me from walking and continue looking with in.
He meets me half way, and stands before me and tells me “Stop thinking, empty your mind, walk with me.”
I just look at the screens, then look at him and see our paths are one. I see his soul, and see my own, and there is like I thread connecting us, all light. He continues telling “Empty your mind , stop thinking, walk with me.” And he holds out his hand and placed in on my chest, and I reluctantly place mine on his(I’m crying now remembering this) and he tells me to close my eyes and just listen, listen to the voice with in. I feel whole, I felt like we were intertwining with each other, it wasn’t split , but a wholeness. It was so comforting and yet I was again fearing doubting , and again he chants, “Listen, don’t think, just listen.” I’m conflicted, even now in conflicted, don’t know if you can read this, it’s a back and forth I’m going through.
Still I continue listen, and I can feel warmth all over my body, I hear my heart loud, strong, clear, I felt it all over me, I wouldn’t say two heart beats, but a soul beating as one, very strong, and all over my body, and the warmth, there was so much warmth, and tingling, prickling feeling. Don’t know if anyone has felt this.
When I open my eyes, I don’t see two bodies, we weren’t physical bodies anymore, we were light, energy. He tells me to free my mind, not to think. And I do it with out hesitation, and all the TV’s all that I knew turns off. We stood in darkness, all we say were each other. He asked me what I saw, what could I hear, feel, see, I saw nothing but me and him. I heard nothing but me and him, a humming, vibration. All was gone, all was quiet, my mind had just stopped rationalizing and analyzing all I did was listen and feel with my soul, hear my soul. It was just my soul, nothing else, no distractions, all I knew was gone. It was amazing how it all just shut off. I can’t explain the feeling. It’s like standing in the middle of a room and you are surrounded by peace, all that you hear is your own voice, all that you feel is the warmth inside, all you can touch is the energy, and it was just….It just was.
He tells me “See how wonderful it is. See the potential, walk with me. Heal with me, it’s time, it’s our path.” He holds out his hand, I look at it, and look, I see light, I see that thread, that rope that connects me to me, connects him to him, connects us to each other and I take the leap of faith, and take his hand and its then that woke up.
I will like to point out that I slept a really deep sleep, but when I woke up I had dark circles under my eyes like I didn’t sleep at all, I feel drained of energy, and I feel loopy, almost like a flying feeling, gliding if that makes any sense. I sat on my bed and everything came to me, the dream, everything as if it happened a minute ago. It didn’t feel like time had passed, I still felt like I was in a dream like state, that’s also hard to explain. I know I slept, but it felt at that moment like no time had passed, it still felt present. One minute it was twelve, twelve, the next it was seven thirty in the morning, yet it felt like it all just happened. I don’t know it hard to explain, that’s the best I can do.
All this is so new, first stages, and I’m trying to understand it. Knowing that it’s really not meant for me to know the unknown. So I’m not questioning it anymore. To say I won’t slip up and do so, is a lie. It will happen but even then I won’t stop.
I have to say that all this time my restlessness is my fear of sleeping, it’s the only time that there is no distraction, it’s the only time I listen to me, and that make me look inside myself, deeply inside myself. That’s why I fear sleep, I know that now.
I feel different, that is another thing Thats hard to explain. There’s so much, and it all is hard to explain. I know, that’s all I can say. It’s the feeling of knowing.
Like I said I’m just allowing me to drift and just let me guide me, instead questioning where I’m being guided. After last night, I’m just allowing me , my inner soul to guide me.
So, can a twin ask you to walk with them? Cause he did, and I leapt, that’s the only thing that I can see it as, just leaping. Are some meant to walk down the path with each other?
I know I can’t ask what that means, cause for everyone a different experience plays out, each of us have different purposes. I guess what I’m asking is, can it all take place so fast. The break through, the walk I believe is the hardest challenge, I don’t think taking the step is.
Still, what might this mean?
As a form of energy what you experience becomes translated into thought based experiences.. You will seek for knowledge of what can’t be understood in the mind seeking all the answers of what this is outside you never knowing the truth of this connection to your twin is always in you, the mind becomes splintered in this connection, as the seed of energy is finally grown.. It is grown much like a seed under a concrete slab.. If there is a crack in it and somehow it gets water and sunlight based on vibrational variations of the cracks in the foundation = (the lie you tell yourself you are) something triggered emerges in growth… the soil which is the soul becomes self aware and now seeks more light and more water…. a growth of what needs to become true continues.. As this truth is grown something will come along and step on it in this case and all cases the mind made me. consistently seeking for answers outside you, or seeking others to help you understand without doing the work of going inside yourself… many can’t even see this path as they haven’t awakened to this truth… yet the conflict of what you are and the mind made me will separate and keep you in a constant state of patterned control as it becomes self destructive to show you a deeper foundation of truth which has no need for the content of the mind to seal this connection.
This is the earthquake of those cracks, called a twin flame birth and union, it is the earthquake that rocks your foundation, yes you are whole yet you divide yourself based on experiences that give you a mind domaninance to say you aren’t.. energy in words is a very dangerous and powerful seductive state that will keep you from any belief that this connection is possible.. the stronger the mind tells you it’s impossible the more the truth can be stated is a lie..
You are able to have a human connection that seems blissful in any relationship.. In this relationship twin flames are not without the truth of what is under the cracks and the concrete being exposed… This is this connection. It is not a parable to be placed with well placed words it is a connection like no other..
It is purely vibrational.. not situational, not a thought process to be controlled or dissected, believe me I tried.. It is not any of those things.. If you look in the mirror in human you see your shell.. If you look at a mirror inside you, you see your essence.. Not your make up, but your truth.. NO magic mirror, just your energy and how it projects to others mainly to yourself, in the other is the same energy that is being called to.. notice I am not giving it any emotions I am stating it as energy for in truth that is what makes you up to be animated in human form!
To make it a simple picture your mind can see.. imagine a ball of energy split down the middle turns into two balls and one ball goes into a woman and another ball goes into a man. In this world.. a man becomes dominant in thought, a woman becomes dominant in emotion.. this may or may not be the case.. but in theory this is a truth to make this explanation simple… through out any history a story is made with few abilities that you are told you may or may not possess.. You can feel someones energy… when someone is high energy you can feel it.. imagine another that shares this energy in connection…. I need to be clear here so you see any other way this needs to be seen is fine! it doesn’t truly seek gender, it seeks the vibrational connection of energy that mirrors back to you what you are, where you came from, as that door is still open just as the one you will take when you leave here…. This connection is very valuable in why you are, how you connect to all things, to include what shook your foundation to show you deeper inside yourself as energy and the translation of that energy.
Who would you be if you were completely exposed to another, your thought process, your pains, your secrets, your identity which is a false identity, your lies, your hang up’s, your energy in motion of beliefs and non beliefs.. It is on purpose with taking all your pain and birthing you through it like you should have through any pain.. It is the birth of a consciousness that is unseen cause it becomes contagious in connection in you to yourself and deeply rooted in another. You have one and yes they are here when you are and leave when you do.. It is not they are watching over you.. they exist in stream of existence.. A soul mate can give you connection but they can’t shift your belief.. A twin does this and takes the word belief and proves it by the truth of what you are!
I believe this to be true that a soul mate can’t shift your belief, because my soul mate didn’t shift mine what so ever. In fact we clashed so much, because we were both stuck in our ideals(ego trips, fighting for dominance). Because of this journey, I left him. I noticed, that he was hindering me, growing. He wasn’t allowing it, he didn’t want me to. He wanted me to continue being dependent on him, and I on him. The toxicity between us, wasn’t going to allow me to walk the path I am walking now. While going through the break up, it was then that everything seemed to just come to life( its when my twin flame reached out to me) in every conversation I had with him, I always told him he awaken something in me, something no one has ever been able to tap in to.
The more I search, the more I learn. It’s not making sense of it, that makes sense. That’s how I put it.
I’m so grateful and thankful that I came across your website. It feels good to have others out there when you need support, or just I guess others that you can relate to and relate to you.
Thank you so much for answering me my questions it means a lot.
A death of a relationship is profound and as you will reflect this and deeply re engage inside yourself to connect first through the relationship with yourself folds unto the dissolving of this relationship as the truth finds you…you will see the difficulties of your connection that energy claims within the relationship and how your energy reflects in you as yin and yang…this truth is of the same flow of love that animals know in knowing.. This path has no time as in past or future only now… You will become more self aware of knowing and the mind will become much more silent from this.. Not because of control but because of choice…
Hi Clark , hope all is well : )
I wanted to ask you a question. As you began your journey, and your path of awakening. Did you notice or started getting a lot of people, friend, family members who were going through emotional problems come to you for help?
Lately, I’ve had family members, friends who’ve never come to me for help or advice , ask for help. Many are depressed, and just emotionally unstable, I wouldn’t say unstable, but just in bad shape emotionally. And I wanted to know if you started having a lot of people just break down and tell you what was troubling them? Cause I feel like in drawing that energy in, or it just could be that I’m imagining. All I know is that I’m getting high volumns of friends, even my ex breaking down emotionally. Don’t know if you understand what in trying to ask since it’s difficult. I believe that certain energies can attract other energies, I think this is what might be going on. Which is overwhelming to me because it’s an overload for me since I want to help , but it’s to much for me since I’m going through my own process of healing, and looking deep with in myself. If this happened to you, how did you deal with it? Cause others vibes, and emotional energies tend to rub off on me, I’ve always been like that before I started this journey and now the energy, their vibes is just way to much for me to handle.
Yes as you find this mirror you will attract those who seek to heal and this is where and how I write and what I write came from.. The deeper I went inside, the more I could see the tangible, and the ways of what my mind would make it, I would see in them my own pain and how I birthed through it! I suppose the more this energy would find me.
I would stand and help them see the truth an it would enable me to see even a deeper truth inside myself and the world of form to formless.
This healing you go through has a pathway.. This pathway to energy allows the energy of pain you go through to reach deeper inside and allow you to learn and become more of a student to heal than a teacher who has learned through years and years of taking classes to earn a degree.
The purpose is to keep you feeling to embrace energy in motion.. Know that the healing you are in, can and will heal others, all the while taking you deeper. Grow this love my friend or contain it, the choice is yours… You have much to say and much to teach to learn. Email me if you see lossless ness in your words.. They become jumbled during a time when the mirror is showing you yourself. You have to let them show you there meaning which changes with knowing vs. the mind that is there to translate.
I hope this helps!
Clark, thank you for the wonderful posts on this topic. I have a question for you about my situation that I would like to ask. How do you best handle it when your Twin Flame even goes so far to block you out of their mind to the point where they would deny you exist, and somehow block even connection to the love spiritually? Mine is married, with children, and had found himself unable to leave his family because of fear, guilt, and love for his children. This left us unable to be together, and while we worked together for a couple of years pretending nothing had happened and a connection didn’t exist, I found the constant lie to be too exhausting and I left that job a year ago. I haven’t seen or heard from him since. I get an immense amount of sadness and feelings of suffocation coming to me through our connection, but if I try for anything else all I see is him as a statue, with his back constantly facing me no matter how I try to see his face. When I last spoke to him it was clear to me that he had completely broken. He was in actual shock that I had quit the job, he was robotic, and nothing I could say or do could reach him. I told him I still cared, I told him I still felt the connection.. he sat in silence and stared at me. When he did speak, it was to say bizarre things about his “intensive therapy” that he was in.
So for me it is quite painful. I already had issues with abandonment, and have had to try and work my way through this, without being able to get anything through the connection except further pain. I’m single, and strongly suspect that if he is to ever enter my life again (uncertain but unlikely) it will be long after his children are grown. So in the interim, I am trying to find my way through this energetic mess of pain while not successfully attracting anyone else into my life since I’m still attached to him, and having a hard time finding that place of love. Do you know how to handle the situation when the connection is this toxic?
http://wp.me/p2ML45-17N I posted your answer here! 😉
Clark…do you have any good techniques on how to heal from wounds… I feel inside I have so much to release so I can be free and transform. I dont want to suffer nomore. Im just not sure on the best way to release it.
If you could possibly give me any help on this matter id really appreciate it
Email us directly my friend…. Superman1017316@yahoo.com
Such a powerful post. Whenever I feel the need, I always come back to revisit and gain perspective. I am one of the lucky ones that is in contact with TF. We met almost two years ago, found out he is in a long-distance open relationship so we were able to spend (intimate) time together during the week while his girlfriend would visit him on the weekends. During the week its magical, but once Friday comes, we don’t have contact at all until Monday and it’s killing me slow. They were friends for 6 years before dating and she is truly one of his only friends besides myself. So I can see how its hard for him to let her go. I just don’t think I can continue seeing him maybe 1-2x during the week, then pretending he’s not with someone else over the weekends. The longing is unbearable. For a few weeks I’m good with it, then my patience runs out and we don’t speak or see each other for a week to a month. We’ve been repeating this cycle since we met.
The connection is undeniable. The love is undeniable. But he has stated or implied in many different ways that he will won’t end things with her to be with me. You just don’t do that, he says. “You wouldn’t want me to do that to you, would you?”
Question is: Do I end the contact once and for all until we are both ready, or do I continue being in contact with him and try my best to not lose my cool? If I decide to separate will it add to his trust and abandonment issues? Or better yet, how do I work on myself in order to better manage the energies and the emotions? I just need help. I can’t keep doing this.
You state that he has abandonment issues, do you? And why would you lose your cool? There are buttons pressed inside you of things unresolved within you. These unresolved feelings are there for a reason and your connection is here to help you relive them or resolve them. What is this cool in you that is about to be lost? Is it for lack of understanding his choices or understanding your own?
I do have abandonment issues myself, yes. I push people away when there is a threat that they may leave or reject me. Or when things don’t go my way when I feel so strongly about them. To protect myself. I have been working on not doing that since I am aware that I have those tendencies. I just don’t know how to do that in this connection. I want to stay grounded, I want to stand tall in our love and not let it waver. But I have my bad days and I feel so devastatingly crushed by his rejection of me that it is difficult for me to always be in my heart space. So I go back to protecting myself, hardening my heart, I’ll find someone else, or at the very least, perhaps I should just walk away for awhile. I just don’t know what more I can do but leave this connection alone. He does indeed trigger me when I try my best to not let it. But it should be more organic, no? I shouldn’t have to try so hard?
Perhaps my question is–is there a way to work on our respective issues WITHOUT separating?I know separation is necessary in the TF dance, but is it possible to work on our issues TOGETHER? My heart breaks at the thought of deliberately distancing myself from him. It feels hurtful. Like I am punishing him for something he did.
As you stated your heart breaks of thought… pay attention to this statement as it is the truth about what you feel… It is the pathway to how one sees in a way that it becomes their reality. This reality has the power to be changed inside of the words themselves that are keeping you both where you are. The punishment is from how these words are translated in you both. How do you change the words to change the pain itself?
Also, isn’t there a point where I can’t keep giving love and being vulnerable to him when he keeps telling me he cannot be with me in the way that I want?
How much love do you give yourself my friend? Let’s remove him from this.. You are seeing a mirror in which you are inflicting a pain on yourself. How much love can you place inside of the pain you are giving inside of you?
My twin and I wanted everything, but in reality what happened was that he was able to give a little then he would go. This was hard for me, because I wanted everything and could also feel him wanting everything, but then it would crash each time. I could not stop meetin up with him. I tried to tell myself I could cope with the pain, just accept whatever he can give, because he has his life and the reasons for this not being able to be together. Even if I loved and loved, and understood and adapted myself to fit in with whatever he wanted, as this would my only way I could have any connection with him, my heart just became a sick and hardened place. I separated because I could not cope anymore. I thought if I reached a place of acceptance of exactly how he is and not want for anything it would be ok, but I was wrong. I found myself facing a crushing pain, then having to suppress it even more, in order to put on a brave face and continue. This just made things worse, because I was focusing on the pain even more.
I separated and moved home to concentrate on healing myself.After 4 months I felt a strong pull to contact him again. I did it and we had a back and forth dilemna of whether to meet up again. In the 4 months, I made a closer connection with my own heart in a new way, it is a work in progress. I felt such a big longing to see him again I could no longer suppress it. But then all the ugly fears from the past reared itself and in my mind I came up with many reasons not to see him. The day before I was going to travel I phoned to say that I was not ready. I hate what has happened, but I felt a surge of pain in heart and was scared that I was going to be sad again. I reach a place yet again of just letting him go, even though I want to be with him very much. It turns out he now has a job in my city and will be moving over next month. I have given up trying to think ahead of what I will do and say if he contacts me again. He just drives me crazy. If he wants to meet, this time I will just say yes without any of the long converations about it, this just makes it worse.
You only have now my friend.. what was or will be is never now.. You can only be what you feel in this moment.. I see much of the confusion in what is written here. Yet what is it that you feel in this moment is what you will experience if it is confusion then that is what he will feel from you. Seek deeper my friend there is more to you than that!
Thank you for this hope. Today I took a brave step outside the comfort zone (again) and I could feel spirit by my side supporting me. By this I mean the unexpected companionship of a smiling stranger on a train and then unexpectedly seeing an old friend.
Sometimes you have to close your eyes to see my friend… 🙂
You have for sure given me hope with this post. Well written and the feeling of hope just shined right through!
I’m glad it spoke to you my friend!
Hi! I am in a difficult position right here. I met my soulmate i recognize her from the first time. The bad thing is that she is with another gay and she thinks that its very difficult for her to deal with such a problem so as a result of that she prefers to stay with him in order to avoid bad heartfeelings.She can see me as her twinflame she can feel the intension in our relationship .Help me with this please its really a barden. Excuse me for my bad english i am from Greece.
we would be glad to help email us at firstname.lastname@example.org
I needed to hear this message! So eye opening and moving. I just recently met my twin flame. We are both married. I felt like I wanted to be rescued from my marriage because I was so unhappy.
But I am the one to rescue myself. My pain was reflected in my “mirror.” This message you wrote was exactly the courage I needed to hear in order to take the first step and leave my marriage. Even if my twin flame doesn’t follow suit, I’m so grateful that I was shown the truth in my reflection, which is setting me free!! I don’t have to live with the burden and wondering! Thank you, thank you!! 😉
This is about the love you have inside yourself for yourself to expand to yourself for others… It is healing in nature.. but it is also something stronger trying to make it’s way to you in this experience. Love deeply, Lois and Clark
The separation pain is excruciating. Is this part of the rebirth pain and working on our self love or is it perfectly normal to feel this pain as our soul is calling to each other longingly? There are some days that its unbearable to live and other times I feel strong and trudge through the day. I guess I could be feeling him too…
At the same time, this is a blessing. To have such strong true love for someone. I also feel loved the same way. But the pain… Oh my. There has to be an end to this agony!!
My twin and I met when we were 15 and 16, however after he chased me for 8 months he moved to another country.
Fast forward 10 years, he sends me a message via Facebook asking to meet up.
We were both at the time going through turmoil from our previous relationships which had failed. Being together was like bliss and was very healing, in an intimate but non-sexual way.
For another 8 months we did the running/chasing where we each took turns. We did talk about getting married and having a long term relationship. However after a minor argument, he wouldn’t return my calls or my emails.
I have been severely sad, not depressed or anything. I was going through a very dark night of the soul, where I have isolated myself from the friends/world other than going to work. I cry myself to sleep most nights and could cry at the drop of hat during the day, even at work.
I have never shed this many tears over one person or experience in my life. I think about him non-stop since the day we stopped communicating.
As I started working through my emotions/inner demons. I recently found out, that he has gotten back together with this ex girlfriend (most likely soul-mate) and are now getting married this summer.
The pain of separation and knowing that your other half has committed to a life with another has been the hardest emotional and physical experience I have ever had so far.
The area I am facing the most difficulty in is moving forward with my life and meeting someone else that I could settle down with, since my twin is out of the picture. So far, no one can compare to this guy.
How do you deal with life after your twin flame?
You deal with this existence as it is, you re birth into being, you take what the connection gives you and listen deeply with compassion, doing the work my friend includes finding a deeper forgiveness in not just you, but all the things that happened to you to include this choice. She married another my friend, and they had a child, this path had nothing to do with me and everything to do with me, he was safe, she was secure in this action, We make some choices because it is something we can’t see fully in what we are connected to. As I look back now, this choice she made only brought other love into my life I never knew was something I wanted. I know that sounds strange but the end result of being in union speaks for itself. It wasn’t until then that I really did my work, the pain this ignited was something that I didn’t go into as deep as I should have then! I found a deeper path and went in with no turning back, what did I have to lose, I had lost already! There is something powerful the flame inside of you burns for, it shows you a light in all the areas that are dark and it can even create a shadow to make you think there is light in there somewhere. Well, the truth is the truth, and that truth was the path to salvation and to our true union. It wasn’t easy and wasn’t without going deep down to where no one wants to go! If you need us we are here dear soul! Love deeply, Clark
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